I’m a bit confused. A bunch of these flowers have suddenly decided to grow in the middle of our lawn. We certainly didn’t plant them. It must have been the birds or our mole. It could be the boy cat. The girl cat brings back dead little animals while the boy cat for some reason brings back plants he has pulled up (normally from next doors once perfect garden). It’s another lawn mowing obstacle to steer round.

My blog is also confused. When I first started this blog I’m not sure what I was trying to achieve. My head was all over the place. I had this vague hope that it might help others, probably by learning from my mistakes. But I’m not sure if the real reason was me desperately trying to find a way to fix myself. Maybe it was just an excuse for me to show some of my out of focus photos.

The blog is seriously confused and I apologise for that. It started off wittering on about bereavement, then brought in single parenting. Then it moved into the Aspergers and Dyslexia. Now it’s becoming a bit of a pet love in.

Maybe the mess of my blog is a reflection of the true state of play for me . The guide books seem to either cover bereavement or parenting or autism/Aspergers or Dyslexia or ADHD or Depression or Pets. They seem to deal with things in isolation. Unfortunately in my case (and probably in many other cases), many issues are all mixed up and intertwined. You can’t consider one in isolation. That’s why the various help guides I’ve acquired are stored away in the loft along with my cookbooks and dog obedience training manuals. Maybe in isolation they might work but in my messy/confused world they seem too simplistic or idealistic.

58 thoughts on “Confused”

  3. Our words are our emotions and they have the capacity to heal, regardless of the subject and who is writing them or reading them. Keep going with whatever is on your mind on any given day. I enjoy your blog! 🙂

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  5. I agree with everyone here – keep on writing! I know I tap into different parts of me when I write, and I change it up a lot. A fellow blogger once told me that if I were to open my blog up instead of just writing about autism mainly – the autism piece would always be there. So just go with it. I think he’s right. So, I say, just go with it. It is all a part of you and I enjoy your blog!

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  6. What ever you do, please keep the flowers… I think they’re Gladiolas.
    They’re so special. A message from someone precious.

    We are the deck of cards we’re dealt. Your blog is a reflection of your deck of cards. I don’t know why I blog either. Or why i share with strangers, throwing it out there. At times it helped me, other times it helped the readers.

    I’m glad I found your blog.

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  7. I think we are all an assortment of messy bits and pieces. Life is messy. So why wouldn’t we be? The flowers in your yard are beautiful. Does it really matter how they got there? I remember driving across country to California after graduating college, and noticing every so often I’d see a gorgeous wildflower growing at the side of the road. I thought how miraculous! That flower grew there against the odds, all by itself. I found that inspiring. Perhaps your flowers are a sign from your partner letting you know everything will be fine! 👍

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  10. Mine started out as his journey through cancer…………and now it is my journey through recovery from that journey. Your blog is whatever YOU want it to be. Writing things down in a journal is so therapeutic. Don’t stop writing. Keep putting these thoughts down or you will find them on like a train track….go ’round and ’round in your head till it can about drive you nuts.

    It’s YOUR journey. Walk it however you can. Just walk it.

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      1. I didn’t request mine either. Just lean on and learn from others. It’s the hardest row you are ever gonna hoe. Just dig in and continue to be there for your son. We are all here to listen.

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  12. Definitely Gladiolus. Gorgeous flowers. Perennials.

    All blogs evolve. I’ve been blogging since 2008. I’m on my 3rd blog and wish I’d kept the original. They change just like we do. And, thanks to the Wayback Machine, all blogs are now permanent history…unless something drastic happens.

    You are building a personal library and sharing your world. Blog what you need. Blog what you love. Tag your posts well. You might help millions.

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  15. Perhaps because we are all a hodgepodge of humanness? 🙂 Your theme is life.

    Oh, and my son saw your flower picture and told me the story of our ‘vampire plant’ that wrapped around another potted plant… Not sure how that helps your beautiful yard flower story. 😀

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  18. I love your blog! You have a way of telling stories people can relate to, in a catchy manner. Plus for me it’s very inspiring to see someone who has been through alot of heartfelt changes, enjoying the simple things of life!

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  19. It all comes down to this: Write what provides you with joy, release from your grief, and helps you heal.

    I lost my children’s father when I was 33 and wished there was blogging at the time. When you connect with others through blogging, you find you’re not alone.

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  21. Your posts make complete sense to me, nothing confusing, just the way a normal, inquisitive, enquiring, intelligent and loving mind works.

    I’d suggest keeping all your posts saved somewhere else too – for your son. He will come to treasure it some day.

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