We have some odd pets. This time it’s the big boy cat. For some strange reason as soon as we light the candle, the boy cat has to sit next to the pumpkin. If we move the pumpkin, the cat follows. Last year he did the same. Bizarre.

Halloween can be an odd time for our son. Before the world changed he loved the whole Halloween experience. Making the scariest pumpkin possible. But after his mum died it took on a different meaning. In his eyes it became a transition date. The cross over between the time he associates with death and funerals to the period of happiness and life. Over the last two years the period running up to Halloween has brought 3 major deaths – probably 3 out of the 4 closest family members. The period after Halloween brings fireworks, Christmas and anniversary of welcoming the mad dog into the family.

Halloween has now evolved into a mix of reflection for what has gone and for a celebration of happier times. Hence the pumpkin has now moved from the scariest possible to a sort of party boy. This is no bad thing.

Maybe the cat is waiting for the party to start. Waiting for ‘Trumper’ to start the festivities. I didn’t ask my son why he called this years pumpkin, Mr Trumper. I assume it’s because of the trumpet like thing in his mouth – can’t possibly think of anything else that the pumpkin could be named after….

74 thoughts on “Halloween”

  4. Your son is handling everything that has happened so courageously. I admire his strength – as I do yours.
    Growing up we didn’t celebrate Halloween, no giving out candy, dressing up, going trick or treating, etc. Now with my own family, I don’t do the decorations, handing out candy, but I do allow my children to dress in costumes – none scary costumes. It’s not a holiday we celebrate. I’m Hispanic and we do celebrate and remember the people that have passed on, on November 1st. But the children lean more towards Halloween than the other, so they dress up October 31st.

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      2. It’s strange how Halloween has changed in my lifetime. When I was a kid, you didn’t go trick or treating, it was a turnip rather than a pumpkin, roasted chestnuts on the fire, bed sheet ghost costumes and a ghost story for bed. When you got into the teenage years I was allowed to watch a Hammer Horror movie.

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      3. Very interesting! You did a lot more than I did! I also think that now, people do take advantage to do even more harm. The costumes are also getting more elaborately scarier by the year. There was a man last year walking around with an IT costume – so real looking, just walking around causing scary reactions to the small children. Ugh! It’s like really, go to an adult setting with that, not where children are.
        A pediatrician came on the radio this morning saying how 45% of children’s deaths happen on Halloween between the hours of 6pm and 7pm. They are caused out on the streets – understandably so, since they are outside. If a parent wants to go out and trick or treat with little ones, they need to be extra cautious of their surroundings.

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  17. Trumper the Pumpkin… Heh. Is he aware of our Prez?

    Your pets are adorable.

    I am so sorry for your losses. Things just never really heal. My paternal-paternal GGF dropped dead in mid sentence on Christmas Eve 1971 on the sidewalk in front of the house. I was five. I just barely remember him. And, my father lost his beloved GF. His Christmases were never the same after that.

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  18. No connection to Donald trump and his orange fake tanned face….?
    No, I’m thinking it’s due to the trumpet thing in his mouth too!
    Youre very good at being observant and reflective about your son and his needs etc.

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  19. I found this post, honestly, very emotional. There are memories we associate with every fest, with every feast and wish for beautiful forever’s until life decides to be uncertain. May be then, as difficult it may be, and I don’t truly know if I believe in it wholly, is time to create new memories. I completely empathise with you and you are doing an awe-inspiring job!

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  20. Oh yes. Two major family deaths here occurred in Lent–the church season leading up to Easter. Those deaths just settle into the season, meld with it, and we can no treat that season as we used to. It sounds wonderful that your son can see the Halloween season as a time to celebrate lives missed and still so dearly loved. Not that we don’t miss them all year–had a cry the other day over my father’s absence again. He’d have gotten such a kick out of his grandkids trick or treating…

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    1. It’s gets me when something great happens and I think that his mum or his grandparents would have loved seeing it. My son lost his grannies and mum in the period just before Halloween. I think he almost sees that period as his ‘sad’ period and Halloween marks that periods end.

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  22. Ciao
    scusami, purtroppo una mia ignoranza d’inglese mi impedisce di leggere il blog. Passerò dal cell al pc così potrò mettere in tradizione e leggerti.
    Intanto…
    Grazie per essere passato/a da me.
    Un sorriso
    Chiara

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