11.30pm – Finally lights out in son’s bedroom. Normally that would induce a mad scramble for my bed. But tonight I just don’t feel sleepy. Very tired yes, but frustratingly sleepy no.
12.05am – Attempt to sleep
12.40am – No sleep, no dreams. Still so tired. Bed abandoned.
12.50am – In my tired state starting to fill up with sadness. Suddenly feel very lonely.
1.10am – Only going to get more depressed if I don’t do something. My eyes glance over to the DVDs. Decision made. It’s time to watch kiddies stuff.
1.15am – Peppa Pig. Please tell me I’m not turning into a Daddy Pig.
1.30am – Ben and Holly. Found a new game – try and identify the voice actors from Peppa Pig featuring in Ben and Holly.
1.50am – Teletubbies. Annoyingly their tummy tellies are bigger than our TV.
2.10am – In The Night Garden. Scarily I remembered every single character name. Decided I want to live there.
2.30am – Hectors House. Now this is a really old one. My favourite as a kid. I’m not sure a dog walking round with a gun shouting “it’s a hunting gun” would sit well with modern TV Executives.
3.00am – Banana Splits. Can’t believe I’m laughing my head off at a letter box which is refusing to let one of the gang have a letter. Also can’t believe I haven’t woke my son up when I shouted “size of an elephant” (that won’t make any sense to you if you have never watched this)
3.30am Inspector Gadget. Why is Inspector Gadget not one of the Avengers? Thankfully this is the cartoon and not the action movie – what were they thinking of.
4.00am Paddington Bear. Made myself a marmalade sandwich to enhance the viewing experience – decided marmalade doesn’t taste great at this time of day.
4.25am Clangers. In my zonked out state I unbelievably can understand Clangers Speak.
4.40 Now I’m completely and utterly gone. As they say in kiddies tv land – time for bed…