It’s the morning after last nights anxiety vortex and the calming late night dog walk. Our son slept reasonably well, the dog extremely well. Me – not so good. Head is still spinning about trying to solve the educational conundrum. How to give our son the best opportunity to find his wings and so importantly take his anxiety away.
My thoughts keep coming back to home schooling but ….. So many factors
- Does this just increase the isolation
- Friendships
- How to unlock the potential
- Keeping open University options
- Type of education
- Support services
- Finances
- The bureaucracy
- What happens if something happens to me
- On and on and on
This morning another option popped into my small brain. I remember a few years back watching a programme about a family living in a remote part of Iceland. May have been on a little Island as I think they were hoping to one day have a Bridge or tunnel built to connect them to the mainland. Post and supplies coming in each day by small boat. Many of the community coming out to welcome the boat as it pulls in each day.
The family had kids about the same age as our son. No schools for miles. They attended a virtual school. Rather than the school bus (or in this case school boat) they logged into a computer. Lessons then took place online with a teacher and a virtual classroom. Webcams allowed the teacher to see all the kids and importantly allowed the kids to see and interact with the other kids. It looked fantastic. Unfortunately our Icelandic is a little patchy!!!! But maybe this exists wider and might be another option to look at. Head starting to spin again so it’s time for another long dog walk. Thank you for reading these confused words. Take care. Góðan daginn
Maybe I might buy a Learn Icelandic book just in case.
I love languages and Icelandic sounds fascinating. I hope you get the book!
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I suspect son would quickly become the teacher.
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A lot of homeschooling parents form groups for socialization, field trips, group lessons and projects, and so on. It’s possible that there are groups like that in your area. Just a thought.
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Thanks will look into it
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Amanda good suggestion. Sometimes the home school will also still let kids participate in some of the electives where there may be less chance of struggles, like art, 2nd language (maybe Icelandic?), etc. Before looking at online options, do some research on whether that is the best learning style for kids with your son’s diagnoses. You don’t want to make it worse.
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That’s one of the problems. In our area they don’t formally support Dyslexia. They will give a general ‘he has dyslexia’ but won’t dive down into the detail. In effect the Educational Psychology Service has been cut to the bone. So it is down to parents to work out best educational approach. Sort of doing it, but it’s not very scientific. Also a really poor interface between the school system and private support bodies.
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We had School of the Air – school by radio! There must be a few virtual classrooms – it just makes too much sense!
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I hope so.
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I have heard of virtual schools here in the states – maybe it is more common now? Worth exploring!
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Thanks. Will do.
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Homeschooling is all over the place in the US. Your son is obviously brilliant and deserves much better than his school has offered him. Please also look into ASD/Asperger’s/Dyslexia support and advocacy groups – there must be many in the UK – who can help with assistive technology and advocacy. Google away – Hope you find the help and support you and your son need and are entitled to.
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Yes the groups are there. Frustratingly they offer conflicting advice but agree the school, system is broken.
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Sorry to hear that – hope you find a solution and many fierce autism moms to support you – Not sure the UK has any laws like our Americans with Disabilities Act, that requires schools to make accommodation – the school would have been required to buy the reading pen and more for your son – provide a note taker, or audio books or a reader and definitely remedy the bullying situation. I hope you are not too far from a larger city like York where better services should be available. Good luck, I am pulling for you and your son!
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Thank you so much. Speaking with other parents some schools are slowly improving how they handle physical disabilities. But mental issues and hidden disabilities are still not being addressed.
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You’re getting very good advice. All I can add are good wishes.
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🙏 Thanks.
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My pleasure.
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I remember that program and the kids eventually had to go to high school on the Mainland (homeschooled up to that point), but I thought it was actually in the Faroe Islands. Or perhaps it was the Orkneys… I know that it was a small Island though.
On another note, lots of homeschooled kids end up far ahead of their peers in state schools. They have more adult skills, and they adjust to responsible behaviours much better, because they are treated as adults rather than influenced by less than optimal childish behaviours. I have met quite young home schooled kids who have impressed me with their maturity.
Greta Thunberg, the 15 year old Swedish Climate Activist who began the School Strike for Climate on Fridays (now of world wide fame), takes her school work with her to her strikes and is encouraged by her teachers. She has Aspergers, yet, it does not interfere with her very mature approach to Climate Change Action. I give her parents credit for this, for they have recognised what their child needs and provided it so that she reaches her full potential. It was not without much thought, much life change, and much change in lifestyle that they accomplished this. Greta does not worry much about what other kids think of her. She is a balanced individual with a strong family to support her.
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I’m pretty sure the one I watched was Iceland. Maybe it’s my mind playing tricks. I suspect it’s finding the right approach for each individual child. Yes home schooling does work so well for some kids but not so well for others. Yes she is impressive.
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My daughter and I homeschooled my granddaughter, who you have seen referred to as Miss Goose on my blog, from age 4 through 18. Why? Well, in the beginning because she had Tourette’s Syndrome and we felt that with her tics, school would only add to her stress. By the time she outgrew or overcame most of her issues with the Tourette’s (without medication, I’m pleased to say), my daughter worked nights, I worked days, and daughter Chris would never have had time with Miss Goose if she were in school. So, we continued to homeschool. Natasha received an excellent education, for I taught history, literature, social sciences — my forte, while Chris taught math, science, and grammar — her strong suits. Both of us hold MA’s, so we were qualified teachers, and Natasha, now 24, can discuss any topic with as much or more knowledge than the average person.
That’s the upside. Now for the downside. She is socially-challenged and frankly, if I had it to do over again, while it was the most rewarding thing I have ever done with my life, I would send her to school. It was only about 4 years ago that she would even order her own meal from a menu in a restaurant. She is kind and loves people who she knows, but she finds it almost impossible to speak to strangers or make new friends.
I have no answers for you, as I know your son has problems that I don’t fully understand, but I tell you this only so that you can see the pros and cons. In the case of your son, it sounds very much like the school system is not meeting his needs, and it may well be that homeschooling, if you have the time to do it, would be the better option. Take time to ponder and explore all options. If you have questions about homeschooling, or just want to bounce some ideas off somebody, feel free to email me at dennisonjill@aol.com any time. Meanwhile, I feel for both you and your son and hope you can find the right balance for him … and for you!
Hugs!
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Thank you again for the hugs. It’s as you say pros and cons. No clear winner. We talked again about it yesterday. Agreed to give school a real go again until the summer. Then make a decision. Gives us time to work things through. I suspect if my partner was still here that the home schooling option would be favoured. Can’t yet see a way of homeschooling and trying to pay the bills – unless I completely burn the candle at both ends. Maybe I can for a few years. Time for a hot drink.
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Question: Do you have family close by who could help, say a sister or cousin? You can only burn the candle at both ends for a short time … I know, for I’ve tried. Also, I don’t know about there, but here there are sometimes homeschool groups — like-minded parents who work together, helping each other out. Perhaps something worth looking into, anyway.
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Yep it all needs factoring in. At least by agreeing to make a decision in the Summer it buys us some thinking time. lottery win would help….
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Yes, but you do realize that you have to buy a ticket first, right? 😉
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Darned it – forgot about that bit. Plan C then I Suppose.
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😀
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Certainly something to consider. I wonder if this occurs in other remote parts of the world.
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Sounds like it possibly does.
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Don’t you have schools/teachers there that specialize in cases like your son?
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The area has a few but they have to cover 650 schools in such a large geographic area. You might get a few minutes every year if you are lucky. Plus it’s very much stick to the one offered teaching approach but place in bottom set.
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Your son is smart. Home teaching might be an alternative answer.
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Isn’t Icelandic supposed to be one of the most difficult languages to learn?
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Yep and I struggle with English….
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Amanda’s idea looks good
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It does.
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Are there other schools?
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All much of a muchness…..
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You may find one that he will adore. Good Luck
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Let’s hope so.
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Thanks so much for visiting my blog. I’ve enjoyed reading some of your heartfelt posts! Home educating for us – and many others – was a wonderful inspiring and workable approach to both learning and life that we never once regretted! I remember the anxieties you’ve raised above but honestly none of them were really an issue or unsolvable! All the very best to you.
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Thank you and this gives more power to the home schooling case.
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Virtual education may have its pluses but it also takes away when it comes to learning to interact socially which is also a part of education. Navigating what is best for your son is a challenge that in time you will meet.
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It is tough navigation. Each option has pros and cons.
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I hope you find enough support and a reasonable solution; it does sound like your son has “outgrown” the traditional school system; I was a tutor (in Mexico) for a brief period, at a company which offered the open/home school option, and those kids were thriving.
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It’s just trying to find the best fit for him. Not an easy choice.
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Absolutely not to be done hastily, all the best!
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You to.
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If this is available to you, it sounds a wonderful solution. Good luck!
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Fingers crossed
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Great post!
I believe that a great job can be done using the net in the best way.
I attended a master class with my pc connected to Parma – Italy – and with a dozen of other students from other regions. One of them is blind.
Unforgetable experience!
Ciao to all of you from Italy!
Vicky
😊😊😊
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Thank you so much. Yes the pc route does have many advantages.
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God bless you!
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Thank you
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My daughter has had great success with homeschooling.
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It works really well for some kids, possibly not so well for others. It’s good to hear your success.
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I believe virtual schooling exists in many countries, other than just Iceland (Canada, in the Arctic, for instance). Surely, there must be virtual schools somewhere in the UK. The comments about social interaction are right. If home or virtual schooling is used, other forms of interaction will need to be found. Good luck. Allan
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Maybe it needs a mixed approached to schooling. Thank you
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Reblogged this on By the Mighty Mumford and commented:
K-12 IS ALSO AVAILABLE IN THE U.S.—TUITION FREE. PERHAPS AN INTERNATIONAL VERSION?
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Thank you so much.
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Youse a good story teller. 🙂
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Thank you so much.
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Thank you
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Homeschooling isn’t just you at home with your son, where you have to be expert at everything and he never interacts with anyone his own age. I’d explore homeschooling support groups for more info – even if for say financial reasons you don’t feel you can do it, it will give your mind something constructive to think about.
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Yes the next few months are very much fact finding.
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That’s good!
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Being a single parent of two now adult girls I can totally relate to the constant worry and questioning your decisions.
All I can add to the great advice already posted is:
Remember we are not perfect and as long as our decisions come from a place of love and we do what we are capable at that moment in time, then we have done well as a parent.
All the best. You sound like a wonderful father and a typical worried single parent 😊
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Thank you for your kind and reassuring words
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I know I talked about all this, but seriously, it may be worth a look for you and your son. But it’s got to work for your job, and there’s got to be SOME time for him to be around other kids. Considering where you are, there’s a good shot there are other homeschool groups you could hook up with as far as extracurricular activities/athletics go, just as some sort of socialization. But if Wisconsin has free online K-12 education, then I bet there’s some sort of virtual system by you, too! xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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I’m going to really look into it over the next few months. Summer feels like a potential tipping point. You will understand this more than me but when you are constantly tired and battling internal worry demons – it makes clear thinking so difficult. xxxxxxxx xxxx
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That, I completely, completely understand. x
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Often the moments of clarity the less tired spells do not coincide with the times you really need them to..
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Or you could move to Australia… https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/School_of_the_Air…
… The language is easier to learn than Icelandic – just! 😉
Plus the weather’s a lot nicer!
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Now that’s what a I talking about. That would be perfect. I suspect Iceland has a tad less poisonous spiders and deadly snakes though.
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A tad! Hmmmm… i see an ‘issue’.
However, you could assure him the Vikings never made it to Australia!
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That would have been some saga if they had…
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I’m pretty sure with their fair hair they’d all get severe sunburn and would decide never to come back – Oz would not have been a very appealing place in the 900’s for them. 🙂
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