You try and show off your Messi like ball skills (in my dreams)… Then something gets in the way. The dog loves football. He’s very keen however he still is struggling to pick up even the most rudimentary basic game rules.

“Dad now its the end of the season it’s time to check our team predictions.” Each of us tries to guess where each team will finish in the English Premier League. That’s 20 teams.

Ok I’ll go and find the lists we wrote down.

“No need Dad I can remember where we put each team”. That’s two lists we did back in August. When I later checked – he remembered both lists perfectly. I can’t even remember our telephone number..

Guess who lost….

“Dad you said Fulham would finish 7th. They got relegated.”

“You said Huddersfield would be mid table and they all got 16pts coming last”

“Funniest one is you said Newcastle (my club) would finish bottom. They somehow got to to 13th”.

He didn’t even have to check the final league table. This was memorised perfectly as well.

“As you came second I need to decide your forfeit. You have to listen to YouTube Alvin and The Chipmunks song videos for three hours solid.”

Deep joy. Still could be worse. Could have been U2….

78 thoughts on “Football”

      1. Is it all over now? Have Man City won then? I have not seen the news over the past few days.
        What about the European final with Liverpool and Tottenham – has that been played yet? I could not believe that 4-0 game last week, I almost wrote a post about it! But I do like to be neutral. But its hard not to keep an eye on the football team from your home town.

        I keep trying to hear Alvn & Co’s version of “Blue moon…you saw me standing alone” but I cannot find it for some reason.

        Liked by 2 people

  5. Ha. Those Chipmunks are still around? I still remember all the lyrics to ‘”Christmas, Christmas time is here. Time for joy and time for cheer. I’ve been good but I can’t last, hurry Xmas, hurry Fast. Want a ball that loops the loop. (Alvin, in solo:) Me I want a hula hoop! We can hardly stand the wait, please Xmas don’t be late.” Was that in your repertoire? I still remember those lyrics by heart sixty years or more after I first heard them!!!

    Liked by 3 people

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  8. The awesomeness of living with brilliance. Reminds me of my 7 year old grandson who occasionally will beat me at Scrabble. I play against the computer at the highest level and win 80% of the time. Couldn’t have come even close when I was 7.

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      1. Thank you so much! It was a lot of walking (and history isn’t my thing) but it made Declan happy, it went well and so I was happy to oblige. I really enjoyed this post of yours. Your son made me smile again with his wit and memory (and your sad Alvin punishment 🙂 )

        Liked by 2 people

  16. I apologise in advance if I have already told you this story – your son would probably know if I had or not! – but Cat Daddy also can’t stand U2. His hatred stems from the time they gave a free album on iTunes and Cat Daddy, quite reasonably, assumed you would have to log on and download it if you wanted it (he didn’t). But instead they added it to everyone’s accounts and, when he tried to delete it, he deleted his entire iTunes catalogue.

    Obviously nobody uses iTunes anymore except for their morning alarms, but Cat Daddy is still scarred by this.

    Liked by 2 people

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  17. He really doesn’t have your genes, does he?

    That’s probably a good thing, considering. 😉

    Great to see that even with such a high cost to pay for coming second you can still display some sense of humour through it all!

    Keep it up! 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

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  18. I’m with you on the U2! Lol.
    My son has a great memory too. Played Cleudo last week and he had every interaction memorised and figured it all out and won the game in about ten minutes. We thought it was random luck until he explained “well, it couldn’t have been X because Y, and it couldn’t have been…..”.

    Liked by 2 people

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  19. You know, your son seems very bright in a quite amazing fashion to the rest of us mere mortals who plug along following sets of rules that make us seem intelligent.

    Have you thought about Mensa testing?

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      5. For a night or two to celebrate Blondie’s birthday. Last year it was obscenely hot, and the matriach inlaw hates having windows open, so everyone’s sweating just by sitting around. Hoping the weather is a touch better this year.

        Liked by 1 person

  21. Brilliant post this, thank you. I think your son has every right to lambaste you for predicting Fulham to finish 7th! Will you stick your neck on the line for the next season? Great blog – your writing style is really engaging

    Liked by 1 person

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  22. Have you listened to Alvin and the Chipmunks yet? Even trying to watch one of them films is hard enough on the ears. I offer you my condolences 😂

    Liked by 1 person

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  25. Pingback: Football — A Dad trying to cope with the loss of his Partner and becoming a single parent. – Naijablog

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