It’s that time again for hopefully some downright cheesy terrible Poetry thanks to Chelsea Owens. This week she has set the following challenge.

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Here are the specifics for this week:

  1. The Topic is free-versing about secondhand sales. Ever been to a yard sale? Garage sale? Flea market? Write about it; flow about it.
  2. Looking for a certain Length? Let’s go with fewer than 150 words. Final offer.
  3. Rhyming is not allowed. This is free verse poetry, people. Curb your instincts.
  4. Above all, make it terrible. e.e. cummings must feel such a shock from your literary efforts that he vows to capitalize his name just to make you stop.
  5. Let’s keep the rating PG or cleaner. What sort of flea market are you going to, anyway?

You have till 8:00 a.m. MST next Friday (September 20) to submit a poem the good ladies blog.

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I got carried away and the first version was an epic unfortunately way beyond 150 words so this is the heavily butchered version 2.

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Wandering round the stalls and jammed full car boots

Sellers imploring you to hand over your hard earned loot

In one car boot an autobiography from Donald Trump

Read that, no way rather have a session with a stomach pump

Then a special offer on CDs from U2 and Bono

Give you money for that, you got more chance of seeing a flying Dodo

Then a car boot with a portrait of a politician, Jacob Rees Mogg

I’d rather have my leg humped by a rabid flee ridden Rottweiler Dog

Some numpty called Farage is selling knocked off cheap French red wine

He bought the bottles with loose change from his European Pension goldmine

Then finally a chance to buy the actual Boris Johnson our countries so called leader

I bought him for 10p he’s now planted pretending to be a Japanese ornamental Cedar.

40 thoughts on “Terrible Poetry

  1. “I’d rather have my leg humped by a rabid flee ridden Rottweiler Dog” and the part “he’s now planted pretending to be a Japanese ornamental Cedar.” both really cracked me up 🙂 Fun poetry read 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Ahh…. it’s THAT time again huh?

    I better see what i can do?

    That image…? Truly terrible! That poor cedar will never be the same. 😦

    You have definitely out-done yourself Sir. I’ll forgive the missing-the-not-rhyming bit. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I’m pretty sure the rules were made to be broken – someone seems to every week. 😉

        You could always keep it in your poetry folder and bring it out when it fits another TP challenge!

        Liked by 1 person

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