4am When the world hopefully sleeps.

The bedroom door bursts open.

Sorry Dad can’t wait to ask. If you had to be related to a king or queen which one would you most want it to be and which would you be most embarrassed to be associated with.

Erm top of my head probably Queen Victoria and probably not mad King George III. How about you son.

Henry V would be so cool but he only had one child and he was pious so it’s not likely. Many would say King John as one your embarrassed with as he is seen as the most useless one but he was actually not as bad as that. Henry VII probably as his claim to the throne was illegitimate. Night Dad.

I then I had a bizarre dream about being late for a meeting with the Queen. A meeting which was to happen on a train in a random rainy town. And I got lost. At least Son had not asked about my favourite Telly Tubby. Getting lost on the way to meet my favourite Telly Tubby would have been a dream too far.

So at breakfast I decided to continue the historic theme. I convinced son to have a trip to see the beautiful ruins of a local Abbey. He wasn’t convinced but finally we set off. I really should stick to my level. The Telly Tubbies. We arrived to find the site closed until March and that knowing look from son. At least we got a few lovely views from the outside.

I gave our son the option of extending our trip but he just wanted to go home. Too many people about. That’s becoming an increasingly common comment from him. As the months go by he finds it harder to deal with social contacts. He can still cope with rock concerts. It’s because he thinks they are still very inclusive. Doesn’t matter what you sound like, dress like or look like – your just accepted. No condescending looks. It helps that it’s dark and noisy so it’s unlikely anyone will talk to him. He was also ok on our recent train night but that was onboard the train. Luckily no one was sat opposite us. On the platform he struggled. We basically stood inside a coal shed until we could board. He had been ok with the cinema but now if the screen has more than handful of people in then he can’t watch the movie. We were going to see Jumanji but the screen was half full and that was the end of that. At school he’s just not happy. The crowded school bus is becoming impossible for him. You can see the change in him when he’s back home. He’s confident and happy. Outside he’s nervous and wants to hide. As soon as we leave the front door his hood goes up.

I remember a conversation with a really good Child Psychologist who worked for a time with him. She thought that his social difficulties may well become more pronounced as he became a little older. She had worked with a number of kids a bit like our son and they had all found mostly happy life’s. But isolated life’s. One or two friends and some family contacts allowed into the inner sanctum. Pets and animals definitely. But the rest of the world – preferably not.

It’s early and things may change. He will follow his own path. I will be there as long as I’m needed. But it’s his own path and he needs to find the type of world he’s most contented with. A closed abbey with a handful of walkers being too busy is potentially an indication of the direction of travel. If that path takes us inevitably into a more isolated world then so be it. And for those interested my favourite Telly Tubby was Laa Laa.

54 thoughts on “Kings, Queens and Telly Tubbies”

  3. Ah, I don’t think that I would be as able to answer such a question at 4 am. It would probably come out like ‘Whaaaatmmmrphhhhhhdunnooozzzzzz.’
    Your son has a very analytical brain! 😊 I never watched the Tellytubbies… It was a UK program that never made it over the pond when I lived in Canada. 😊

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  4. I wish there was some way your son could carve out a social world for himself iin cyberspace as a blogger, just like his dad. It would keep the walls from closing in completely.
    But I guess his challenges with dyslexia rules that out.

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  5. 4am? Yep… no questions though, just demands. Turn the TV on, open my juice, go in the living room, I need tape…
    I do hope you made your meeting with the Queen😉

    Younger daughter preferred LaaLaa too. Her favorite color is yellow. I was always partial to Tinky Winky myself. Marvelous magical handbag!😂

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  7. It’s so what you true what you say about people who like heavy rock. Once upon a time my sons dad and I had a music shop (well actually he still does) and the nicest most polite and accepting people were those into really heavy rock and the goths. Very top of the list of great people were (some would say unexpectedly) cradle of filth fans! The bottom of the list were those into rap (as a generalisation of course) and also the most shoplifted cds. It’s hard this time of year when everything is so busy. My son is the same, he can’t understand why people ‘do’ Christmas and stress themselves out.

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      1. It’s a hard time of year if you can’t cope with crowds. I see my dyslexia was really messing with me in my reply this morning. I don’t know why I do this repeating words or adding phantom words to sentences, it’s usually worse when I am tired. Glad you could get the gist! 😂

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  9. “One or two friends and some family contacts allowed into the inner sanctum.”
    I think many of us are like that. It’s what I’m comfortable with too.
    I’m thinking that your lad has the potential for a great writer (not joking) as writers usually wake up at the oddest of hours with such things on their minds!

    Well-known children’s book authors with dyslexia –
    https://www.understood.org/en/learning-thinking-differences/personal-stories/famous-people/11-childrens-book-authors-with-dyslexia
    Well-known adult authors with dyslexia and other learning difficulties –
    https://www.bachelorsdegreeonline.com/blog/2011/25-famous-authors-with-learning-disabilities/

    The photos are lovely. 🙂

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  10. At least your child psychologist talked sense. Unlike ours, who has become “concerned” at the level of isolation our daughter is choosing, and has threatened to report us to Family Services (child protection etc) as a result.

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  11. When my son reached about 12, puberty took what had been lifelong sensitivities and anxiousness and sent anxiety through the roof. Being in crowds is very hard. He doesn’t go to movies, preferring to watch them online even if he has to wait to see them. His social life is largely via the internet (he’s 17 now). He’ll connect using messaging apps, video chatting, and gaming online wearing a headset. We ended up putting him on medication for anxiety and it has made a difference. He still gets anxious about things, but therapy and meds have helped. Being so sensitive and anxious makes anyone’s world smaller. But I know as my son grows up, he’ll will have his crew of friends, and at some point will find work and learn to support himself. His life won’t look like what I dreamed for him when he was born, but it will be ok.

    Just the fact that you’re reaching out and doing your best, your son will find his way.

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  12. Prefer the Clangers or the Woodentops to the Telly Tubbies (you might be a bit too young to remember those)
    Your son amazes me with his history retention. I forgot everything before I’d got to the end of the corridor after class.
    Merry Christmas to you both, Lovely pics of the Abbey btw

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  15. Blech, I had no patience for Teletubbies. 😛 But I’d consider your trip a success because you could at least see the abbey, if from a distance. Gorgeous structures, you have a beautiful shot with the sun and the windows. Plus, your son did agree to go. That’s a win!

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