It’s time for this weeks bit of panic poetry in the form of Chelsea Owens weekly Terrible Poetry competition.

Here are the specifics for this week:

  1. Topic: Stockpiling against a worldwide disaster, in limerick form.
  2. Length: A limerick. They’re five lines: AABBA, in anapestic meter.
  3. Rhyming: Yes. In AABBA anapestic meter format.
  4. Make it terrible! Got it? Make it terrible!! The world’s ending, after all!
  5. Rating: PG-13. This is the perfect time to panic …poetically.

You have till 8:00 a.m. MST next Friday (March 20) to submit a poem to Chelsea.

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Shelves stripped bare including the Gluten free

Load your boot with every single last frozen pea

You can keep your 10 year supply of toilet roll

Fill your trolley with all the Chicken casserole

But keep your pigging hands off my Yorkshire Tea

85 thoughts on “Terrible Poetry”

  1. Yorkshire tea! 😃 I love it. It made me laugh. Andrew’s uncle ran out of toilet “rolls.” When you use the term toilet “rolls” I think of dinner rolls… and I don’t think they should be anywhere in the vicinity of the W/C (lol) But then we say toilet paper, and I’m sure that could conjure up some imagery as well. I just typed this in your search box. Oops. Nothing came up! Lol…

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  5. To avoid all the germs in the store
    Gladys ate a bluebird and a boar
    She washed down that pig
    With an isolated swig
    That socially infected her snout with a stout.

    You did say BAD?!?

    Traffic was so light yesterday
    Officer Joe met his mistress to play
    But his wife had a fever
    And before he could leave her
    He’d slipped his virus in her beaver.

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      3. Yep. Posted last night, it’s been such a week all round. The ever changing nature of this and the fact that no-one knows what to do is very tough for all. Just trying to go with the tide!!
        Hope you are ok x

        Liked by 1 person

  7. Lol!! They hadnae taken every last pea in that shop called Aldi–sorry, largely cos it looked as if the bag of peas had been fought over and burst …all over the actual last pack of frozen veg which I got… I must say today the gods were favoring me!! I never thought tae see the day when I thought that finding that last packet oh and getting 9 rolls of loo roll in Iceland after seeing this guy wheeling a trolley out of there with a set on top— I had to discreetly bound in and round the shop before the entire car park saw him… would mean the gods had smiled upon me.

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      1. Espesh as i had just come out the co-op…nae flour there either and I was heading back to the car which it had taken god knows how long to get a space for, when this guy wheeled out of Iceland with guess what on top of his trolley… Who would have thought in the good old days the site of a bog roll could engender such joy either? You have no idea how I had to contain myself as I headed for Iceland and when I got in the door, in order not to alert half the car park and get trampled underfoot in the rush….

        Liked by 1 person

      3. The worst of this is the panic and utter hysteria. The worst of this is the way people swallow every screaming press headline and got spew out down and panic some more. For me what it seems this is really about is a shortage of all the NHS necessaries to deal with this on a scale past a certain level. Some very interesting stuff out there now about Italy and the decisions that have had to be made. I makes sense to me cos there’s no abatement there. Despite the lockdown the corpses still mount???? And when did this gov ever care about anyone, especially the vulnerable??? What they really care about I reckon is not looking bad when announcements get made– like the one that was just made about an hour ago about how one hospital no longer has the capacity to treat… So let’s lock everyone down –and play ducks and drakes with their livelihoods– in the hope of containing a spread we cannot possibly deal with cos we never invested sufficiently in the NHS. The thing is not one of them has a bloody clue. While having time for Sturgeon her comment today about Scots on the hole were not clearing shelves or something to that effect is utter rubbish and could only be uttered by someone who plainly did not attempt to set foot in five shops yesterday, all with damn all to be had. Also despite this delivery stuff… I ain’t seen a single lorry delivering anything and if it is being delivered and put on the shelves at night, how come the pensioners who are first in the next day are being greeted by empty shelves? there are unsung key workers who cannot get a single item. Just how long are they gonna go on being key workers.? Gimme a break here.

        Liked by 1 person

      5. Led by donkeys sure enuff. BUT hey let’s not worry there’s to be a golden hour in the supermarkets for the key workers. If it is anything like the pension’er hour they should not hold their breaths.

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  10. The non vegans have taken all the soya and almond milk in Aldi! I was a bit miffed but maybe it will be the start of a conversion so I shouldn’t mind! And did you see that there was an almost boycott of Yorkshire tea after the Chancellor posed with a box and they had to say they weren’t affiliated to any political party!

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      1. Which under normal circumstances might be something to celebrate, I am usually pleased to see vegan stuff selling out, but I keep thinking they will have other options when we only have these so it is a bit annoying, we drink a lot of smoothies and cereal in our house!

        Liked by 1 person

      5. My daughters both love a wide variety of tea, and often gift me with a variety. Hence the full shelf of tea. I do, however, also have a jar of coffee, as well as packages for perking. I do like a coffee from time to time, but mostly it’s tea.

        Liked by 1 person

      7. Several people sent me a voice recording on Facebook of a doctor’s advice concerning this virus and apparently it is really good for you to take a sip of something warm every 20 minutes – apparently the virus doesn’t respond well to heat. There’s a bunch of other advice, some of it very stringent. But glad to hear it if things get any worse. If you’d like I will try to figure out how to send it. I am a little bit technically challenged, but learning all the time.

        Tea is very comforting as well as healing in some instances.

        Liked by 1 person

  22. Pingback: WINNER of the Weekly Terrible Poetry Contest 3/20/2020 | Chelsea Ann Owens

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