Looking back from the edge of the micro world. Our little village increasingly isolated. Sadly we can’t take this walk now. Son started to freak out about having to touch so many farm gates – just in case. So we are restricted to hands stay firmly in our pockets walks for the foreseeable future. How long is foreseeable these strange days….

After yesterday’s accident mayhem we approached April 1st with some trepidation. What enhanced carnage would April Fools Day bring. As life is clearly so foreseeable the answer was rather surprisingly – NOTHING. No accidents. No backfiring pranks. Zip all went wrong. My family tradition was that April Fools Day ends at midday. No accidents by lunch to distract from today’s aim.

We decided to make today a fun day. No talk of the bad stuff happening in the world. No depressing talk. No news. A day of respite amongst the mayhem. I keep saying this but if it’s bloody tough for grizzly old farts like me, what the hell is it it like for our kids. The adults are not that good at living like this, kids most certainly are not designed to live like this. So that’s why today was going to be a rebalancing day. That was the plan but not everything is foreseeable…

Today’s first lesson was Religious Studies. Given the current stress and anxieties kids are facing why don’t we pick a fun or light topic. Well the teacher picked a belter.

Look at four different countries and see what their approach is to DEATH. What are the funerals like….

Well that’s a real laugh a minute project. What next, how about History looking at the Black Death, Geography looking at the spread of pandemics, Science taking a closer look at the Ebola mortality rates.

So we have postponed the fun day for the foreseeable future. As that is clearly not very long we shall be having it tomorrow. Once we rearranged the fun day and put April Fools Day to bed for another year we could get back to normality for the rest of the day – household madness.

Have you ever pressed the start button on the washing machine and as soon as it starts spinning you notice something going round which does not look like an item of clothing. As the machine slowly turned and a rouge object kept appearing, my mind whirled – what is it. Then the penny dropped. It’s my mobile. Oh bugger. An hour later it emerged looking sparkly clean but a little soggy. In a further moment of madness I decided to put it in the pocket of one of the washed jeans and tumble dry it. Maybe that will dry it out. Please children – don’t try this at home. Only really tired parents are allowed to do such stupid things. Unbelievably the super clean phone came out dry. And it still works although I may wait a day or so before I try to charge it up.

So in our foreseeable world tomorrow is fun day and today has been ‘wow my ancient iPhone is sparkly clean day’. Who needs April Fools Day for the foreseeable future.

99 thoughts on “Foreseeable”

  4. I did a disgusted “ughh” to the “death assignment” and I laughed at “Please children – don’t try this at home.”

    What will teachers come up with next? Please write an essay on your worst nightmare ever in gorey detail? That would be uplifting. Then all the students could video conference and share their cheery stories.

    Well… at least your jeans are dry. Don’t ask. It’s really hard to think of something encouraging to comment on this post, but dry jeans are good. Much better than wet jeans. Try doing pressups on the freezing grass in wet jeans if you really want to torture yourself. Stick with dry jeans. Okay, I’m done now.

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  5. I’m trying to imagine self isolation and avoiding contact for people living in villages and cities.
    My isolation routine has been walking in the woods each day hauling maple sap home and then boiling it. Doesn’t seem fair that I have a 20 acre bush to myself while all public parks, conservation areas, the local beach, and any hiking trails have been declared off limits.
    Wow who would have thought.

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    2. I guess we all have swings and roundabouts in our life’s. That sounds so great. We have a garden and can jump over a fence and we are into fields, so we are blessed as well. I bet it swings the other way in time. Maple sap would be great at present we are limited to boiling nettles for tea (I guess).

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  6. I cant believe your phone survived, washing and drying!

    Can the gates be opened with a stick? Son could choose his own “opening stick” from your garden, that would be safe.

    Funerals is the very LAST thing either of you need to think about. Sheesh! Just when I think the school can’t get any worse, they strive and reach a new low. Amazing.🙄
    💌💌

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  7. You’re lucky. I dropped my ipencil in water and being the stupid impulsive me, I tried to see if it worked by plugging it in. It g hv ad survived the dunking but was fried by plugging in. 🤣😅

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  8. gees garry, those subjects are all doom and gloom, talk about laying it on thick and heavy, a fun day is needed I’d say after all that! Lol about the phone, an excuse to buy a new one if you can afford to. X

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  10. Please tell me this whole post is an April Fool’s joke, especially that you still have religious studies in day school. Losing a phone is bad enough, losing a child’s mind is a whole different level of harmbringing.

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  13. A friend of mine told his son that Boris was sending him back to school and videoed him walking there in his uniform before he saw his dad! The lad took it well and it was funny, but I felt sorry for him!

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      1. No-one has to know it is working. I am sure there’s other better lessons. like if you aveh 10 ventilators ..or whatever number Bodge is falsifying now., how long can you fool the public?

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      2. Even the papers are picking up in this now. It feels like for a few months we give the government gardening leave and let the military planners run it. I bet they would do a far better job on testing and getting ppe to those who need it.

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      3. One of the things that has deeply concerned me over this has been the lack of pick up and relevant questioning by the press. Of course there’s a problem and of course those at the helm have not dealt with anything like this but the balls up they’ve made IN EVERY WAY has never been questioned, or pointed out, or picked up, or anything. The misinformation has been appalling. Ask yourself…what do we really know in some ways? This ‘expert’ says that. ‘ This ‘expert’ says this. Dominic Cummings says this. This week alone, we have been told there will be ventilators. When , how many and where? There was to be testing kits. How exactly did they get contaminated? Did they even exist? What would have happened to the mass of people who used them? Now the sanitized handwash made in the good old, bring it out Dunkirk spirit by some booze co, is useless. So what was the point? And why were we reduced to this in the first place? And no journalist or panelist is asking . And this goes all the way down to even things like the lack of clarity over the workforce, over essential items, you name it. That is what has got me most I think. It has just been a spew out by them of fear, hysteria and panic. Even the facts and figures being spewed has never been properly dissected or questioned. Today there were deaths recorded up here that happened days ago, bumping up the total for today. when they did not happen today. One person infects so many people. That’s frankly debatable if that person is virtually a recluse. So it is not before time journalists started doing their jobs and holding these ‘experts’ and these politicians accountable on every level given the sheer and utter mess this is, the sheer and utter mental stress it is causing for many people from kids to adults, and the appalling economic mess that is bound to follow.

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      4. The usual papers and media sources are praising the government for promising 100000 test target by the end of April. Strange that is still less than 400000 less than Germany and less than they promised days ago. Yesterday we were told it’s was only one food shop a week then hours later it wasn’t just 1. We are putting all our eggs in one basket, an antibody test which is unproven and which the first version produced crap results. The military took charge of building a hospital in a week (they did it), yet it took our government 6 weeks to work out that all front line workers in the NHS need protective gear.

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      5. Their latest …meantime in the Uk it is silly season,,, is immunity passports. A wristband… getting more like the Nazis with every passing day.. that will say you’ve had it and can get your ass back to work basically instead of slacking at him on their time and money. Well.. here’s the deal.. by the time they get these kits, people who have had it won’t be testing that they have had it. What about family members who haven’t… ? If we are to believe what is being said re the spread, you can be picking it up on your hands then coming home and infecting a doorknob they then touch… Well?

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      6. Based on a test that is not working properly and based on an assumption that any antibodies found will actually stay. The length they last varies greatly. For it to work they will have to keep retesting EVERYONE every couple of months initially. They can’t even test 10000 at the moment.

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  18. What a topic! C’mon – now?! That’s crazy! Hope your phone works well still! This is such a crazy time, definitely hard on kids. I am just oh so glad I am not doing this quarantine with toddlers. I’d be losing my mind!

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  22. My mouth literally dropped open on it’s hinge as I read the thoughtful curricula choices made by your son’s teachers. Jeepers – how much more do they want to heap onto the young? How about lead by example, how about spread some sunshine not in a happy, clappy way but just authentic uplifting learning. You, quite clearly are doing just that and even manage to add a little frisson of extra slapstick with the terrible incident of the mobile and the washing machine. I am SO glad it survived. Sparkling. A genuine silver (or shiny red) lining.

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  23. Had to laugh about your mobile. Hubby washed hi in the washing machine and it survived the first time, but not the second on fast spin in a new machine. The replacement swam like a brick and ended up at the bottom of the marina. The replacement to that took flying lessons without a parachute out of the car window, and the one he has now is forever getting mislaid, which is probably why he’s had it the longest….. about a year.

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  24. Holy joy, that is truly a collection of unforeseeable happenings. I could not believe what topic your son’s teacher brought up. I have never experienced such a topic in general for children and most of all… why now?

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  25. Strange topic for religious ed even in normal times, I think. But if it pops up on today’s lesson plans it is okay to skip it in light of the current world situation, I would think.

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