Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 30 Comments

Not at all

For days this part of Yorkshire has been weather stuck. Stuck under mist, grey clouds and no sign of the sun. Apart from a few dog walks, the kind of weather that keeps you not too far from the fire. Trying to keep warm, I was sat going through some old photos and came across similar greyness in Switzerland. Rather than sat by a fire, here we were sat inside a warm lake boat, with hot drinks and breakfast, watching the world go reassuringly slowly by. Not belting anywhere at 100mph, just leisurely making our way across lake water. Savouring the journey rather than just impatiently trying to get somewhere fast.

Too often I find life goes by way too quickly, way too much stress, feeling out of control with no time to contemplate life. Even when the weather was grey, I treasured those moments of stillness on that lake. A chance to quietly think and breathe.

Those boat trips are years back, definitely well beyond my rear view mirror now. They haven’t really been replaced with anything similar. Life happened, a new reality dawned. A reality which often seemed like constantly moving from one activity to the next. Constantly busy, constantly occupied, rushing, maybe not achieving anything, maybe not feeling like making progress, just always doing stuff. Feeling like I hardly had any time to stop and breathe.

I love nature, I find so much peace there. When was the last time I spent real time gazing at a real mountain, a lake, out to sea. Not just a a fleeting glance then off again, actually stopping and taking the time to take in the wonder and the beauty. I’m tempted to say I don’t do this enough, but sadly the real answer is NOT AT ALL….

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 66 Comments

Castle walk

Living in the UK has many negatives, things like the weather, road potholes, useless Water Companies, Nigel Farage, Fuel Prices, Morris Dancing, late running trains, Brexit, did I mention the WEATHER. But then again we have some beautiful landscapes and CASTLES. Lots of Castles.

So when the clouds parted we headed off to one such castle. Helmsley Castle, over 900 years of history. It’s a wonderful adventure.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 40 Comments

Sand castles

Autumn in Yorkshire seems to be set in now. Day after day of dark, damp, dreary weather. The heating is now on full time now, guess it will be till 2025.

But then out of nowhere, an unexpected weather gift. The Day Forecast was really poor and the morning brought rain, lots of rain. But without warning the clouds parted. The first sight of The Sun in days.

Got to seize these gifts.

Three hours later we found ourselves 100 miles north, on a beach in Northumberland. With Cloudless skies and a Castle on the beach.

Bamburgh Castle, a setting for many a movie and tv show. It’s something like 1400 years old but unusually for round here, it’s not a ruin. Stately Home, Museum, Luxury Hotel, Wedding Venue. Definitely worth a visit, but with one piece of warning. Don’t bother bringing a bucket and spade to build your own sandcastle. It’s the finest sand ever, like walking in a Desert. Sand gets everywhere and I mean everywhere….. but it will not hold together. Definitely only one castle here.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 34 Comments

Bizarre

I remember that morning so vividly. 11 years ago, on holiday in Switzerland and it was a grim start to the day. I’d got up early, before the family woke up, to go for a run along part of Lake Thun. As I started it was chilly and damp but after a few minutes it started to rain, proper RAIN. It absolutely chucked it down, forcing me to shelter under trees. The rain kept on getting heavier and I kept on getting colder. Time to abandon and head back to the warmth of the Hotel. But then an odd sight. A group of joggers and running under umbrellas. How can you run holding an umbrella….. They stopped and beckoned to me, I think I’m joining them…..

A few minutes later I’m running under an umbrella held by an Italian chap who didn’t speak any English, none of them did. But they were clearly talking to me excitedly about something. Then the mad Italian umbrella group stopped. Stopped in the pouring rain and under umbrellas start to pass around a drink from a small hip flask…. I didn’t ask where that flask had been carried as I couldn’t see any pockets on any of the Italians….. I don’t know what it was but it was warm (with no pockets, a little more concerning) and tasted like cough medicine. Stood in a rain storm, shivering under umbrellas, drinking cough medicine with Italian strangers. Without understanding a word we somehow managed to figure out that we supported equally crap football teams. Newcastle and Monza…

What a bizarre morning. Especially bizarre as it was Hawklad’s mums birthday and just 2 hours later we were sat outside, in blazing warm sunshine having ice cream for breakfast….. As we enjoyed the beautiful weather, 5 Italian chaps walked past, waving, and shouting to me “Newcastle, Newcastle, Newcastle”…

Bizarre…….

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 32 Comments

6.30PM

Summer poses its own set of challenges. This season’s weather hasn’t been great with few warm weather days. Yes there has been sun but it’s often felt more like late October than high Summer. But the weather hasn’t deterred the crowds. Try to go anywhere around midday and the car parks are mobbed. Hawklad doesn’t do mobbed car parks….

But leave it until the evening and suddenly the car parks are empty. Ok that usually means the venue is shut but not everywhere. Just like Dalby Forest. A few hours earlier this walk would have been rammed with hikers, dog walkers and mountain bikers but now at 6-30pm it’s all change. It’s quiet, we are the only car in the car park. A 2 hour walk and we didn’t see another soul.

Or just like 6-30pm on the North East Coast. A couple of intrepid surfers enjoying warming drinks on the beach. A couple of ball chasing dogs with well wrapped up owners. That’s it. Solitude.

Yes 6-30PM cuts down the places open but it opens up so much space and peace. It works for us. Just don’t forget the Woolly Hats, it is Summer here.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 38 Comments

Aliens

Another Spring trip to the TROPICAL Yorkshire coast. This time FILEY. Filey was once a really popular Victorian seaside haunt and on the rare warm day, still gets mobbed. Today, just one day away from the usually seriously busy Bank Holiday Weekend, it was a bit of a ghost town. The 1000 place Car Park, had 3 cars parked up. Yes Saddo counted them. It’s just TOO cold.

A few years back there was a newspaper story claiming that an underwater ALIEN base had been discovered, bizarrely off the coast of Filey….

The town is supposed to be an ALIEN hotspot….. Well I hope the little Green Men have a Base which has robust anti seagull defences and monumentally good heating.

PS… my helpful spellchecker tried to change underwater to UNDERWEAR. Now that would have been a story. An Underwear Alien Base, I’m lost for words.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 44 Comments

Tropics…

It’s either beach weather or…

Frosts at night.

Maybe warmth next….

I think it’s getting to me, water and cold penetrating my wiring. Today went to the Post Office to buy some wrapping paper. Paper collected, I went to pay at the counter using Apple Pay on my iPhone. Easy enough, mobile in hand…..

Well not so easy as my mobile was still at home on the living room table and the thing I’m clutching in my hand, turns out to be the TV remote control.

There are no words…..

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 36 Comments

Saltburn

Three…..

3…….

Stood on Saltburn Pier today and it was 3C. As the wind howled across the North Sea, I dread to think what the wind chill factor was. Apparently it’s still Spring here. Thermal T-shirt, thick jumper and a down jacket simply wasn’t enough. We were FROZEN. But then again as Basil Fawlty once said when told there was always someone worse off than yourself

“REALLY, I’d love to meet them as I could do with a b…..y laugh”

We weren’t those poor souls trying to SURF. We heard frequent bloody curdling screams as they entered the water and that wasn’t a monster JAWS shark causing that. I’m sure I saw an iceberg at one stage, or maybe that was a surfer who had spent more than a minute in those frigid waters. We passed one surfer sat in his car, with the heating full on, holding a steaming cup of something, who was uncontrollably shaking….

Yes good old Saltburn. An old Yorkshire coast childhood haunt of mine. Every year my so called school would do a sponsored beach walk from Redcar to Saltburn and back again. The teachers spent the child free day in the Hydro pub. Don’t tell them but quite a few of the pupils had curtailed the walk after 100 yards and were in the Dolphin Pub, a bit further down the beach. I usually made it to Saltburn as then I got to ride the little funicular up the cliff. Back then that was as near as this part of the world got to Disneyland.

Sadly last years Oscar nominated movie called Saltburn had nothing to do with this little coastal town. Shame that, it might have livened up the movie a lot. I would like to see them attempt a lot of the raunchy stuff they apparently got up to in that movie anywhere near Saltburn beach, in these temperatures. Maybe that surfer sat shaking in his car had tried to recreate some movie scenes and spectacularly failed….

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 45 Comments

Northern lights

More storms, more rain, more wind. The Farmer’s hard stacking efforts are now completely wrecked.

A cold often, grim, winter like day.

Not much fun, a day that felt like hard work.

But you never know what is round the corner. Forced ourselves and the very reluctant mad dog out for a cold, windswept, late evening walk.

The clouds cleared just enough for a few, brief light show moments. The Northern Lights never fail to be thrilling. If only my old phone could capture the beauty just a little better.

It can be such a wonderful life.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 18 Comments

Muddy paths

Muddy paths everywhere.

At this time of year this should be a nice, dry way through the local woods. Not this year. In fact part of the path is closed off as it is flooded. Early morning runs through here are currently a slide FEST. Hopefully it can dry out as the bluebells will be out real soon, maybe they can swim.

As my muddy legs got even more muddier this morning, I was pondering on something a work colleague had said in a meeting.

‘Daughter will be going to University September next year. That’s it, most of my full time parenting will be definitely over. She wants to go to St Andrews, then travel for a few months, then get a job in London. So in 17 months we get a spare room and maybe I can finally get that pool table….. Just need to get her through her driving test in November.

A clear timescale. Yes things might change, but still plans. It feels quite ordered with clear milestones.

I don’t get that feel, never have with this parenting gig. The way forward is hopefully full of so much potential, but it’s filled with so much uncertainty, so many unknowns, so many complications. When will he be able and willing to leave home. How much support will he need, where can he get that support from. Even have no idea about if and when he will be able to start driving. So much uncertainty, I’ve given up trying to plan or put in milestones. Just got to keep being there as best as I can for Hawklad and see what the future brings.

And YES, I ain’t ever buying a pool table. It will just end up being another shredded, pet hair disaster zone. I can definitely predict that fact.