That’s as bright as it’s been really….
But at least there are the first signs of this year’s flowers.
I recently bumped into someone we got to know at Hawklad’s first school and she asked after him with the following words…..
“Is he now over his Autism….”
Deep sigh…. Where do you start with that….
What’s really worrying is those words came from a Teacher.
That’s one wet and muddy path, but it’s just a tad damper on the other side.
This winter I have genuinely had enough of this feet drenched and muddy dog baths seemingly every single day.
I seriously need some of that Alpine Paradise.
I wish I was in Switzerland right now.
Pilot having fun or maybe a pilot realising that a packed lunch was left back at The Terminal.
Lovely blue skies from a few weeks back, it’s been definitely not blue skies since then. The fields keep on getting muddier.
Perfect weather to reread Wuthering Heights, no wonder the classic grim tale was set in deepest Yorkshire.
I was chatting with a postman this morning and he talked about a man who lives near a surrounding village. At the start of January, he had moved into an old farmhouse a few miles away from the nearest housing. He told the postman that it had been weeks since he had spoken to anyone. He has no family, he didn’t know anyone in the area and was really suffering from the isolation. He had signed up to a local walking group but the walks have been cancelled due to the state of the paths. He had signed up to the local golf course, but that had been shut for weeks due to flooding. The postman was his only social contact currently. What made it so much worse was that when he went shopping to the local city supermarket, no one would ever make eye contact with him. He described it as being ‘invisible’, like he didn’t ’exist’. The supermarket only has self service checkouts so he couldn’t even chat to someone scanning his shopping.
That got me thinking. How often do I go shopping with my head down, with my walls up.
I strongly suspect that’s happening way more these days, a pandemic certainly hasn’t helped. What is clear, more people are feeling isolated and cut off. More and more people are struggling, feeling unseen.
Tomorrow I’m going to make an effort to keep my head up when I go shopping.
Eye contact, maybe a smile, maybe even saying HI.
The last storm toppled the walls of this STRAW CASTLE. The Farmer won’t be happy.
At least it is still in better shape than the local stone castle.
One of the first post funeral trips I managed by myself was to a book fair just a few yards from what’s left of this castle. It wasn’t easy or enjoyable but I did do it, a step forward back then. One of the books I brought home was a ‘how to survive bereavement’ guide. It quickly ended up in the bin but I do remember one thing it talked about. How talking to a lost loved one might feel natural but wasn’t a good thing. Apparently it just stopped you moving on.
I clearly didn’t listen to that gem of advice that well.
Even after 7 plus years, if there is any news about her SON, I tell her. To me it’s not about moving on, it just seems the right thing to do for us.
Maybe one day someone will produce the shortest ever bereavement guide. One page. Maybe it just needs to say.
Every grief journey is unique. As time goes on you will start to figure out yours.
Back many many many years, at university, I remember a climbing buddy having an old battered poster on her kitchen wall. It was a beautiful mountain, with its reflection perfectly captured in a lake. In bold the message was something like “Keep looking, there is at least one place where you will fell truly ALIVE”.
Several decades later I was blessed to be able to stand by that very same lake and by that very same mountain. The Poster was so right….
These places DO EXIST.
Sometimes you hear things that just pass you by. Sometimes you hear things that you think, that’s interesting. Then very occasionally you hear something that stops you in your tracks and you cry out
‘I’m sorry, say that again…..’
Sat in the Departure Lounge at Geneva Airport, talking to a Swiss Couple also waiting for the same plane. Two couples, two pregnant couples. The subject randomly got onto prospective child names.
“If you want that name then you better have your child in Britain. You won’t be allowed to call your baby that in Switzerland. Swiss Authorities have to approve names and have strict rules…”
Officially stopped in tracks.….
Switzerland, yes the country has naming rules. Can’t use names that might have a negative impact on a child’s future. Can’t use place or brand names. Middle names frowned upon as no room on official forms for them. Double surnames frowned upon. Some names changed to reflect local Italian or German pronunciations.
To be fair the couple did say things had become a bit more relaxed over the last few years, but rules are still there. At one stage there was even a list of approved baby names that you had to pick from.
Switzerland is a stunning, amazing country, it’s also occasionally just a bit barking mad. Coming from Yorkshire, I like that.
Two storms with names this week, that’s 10 named storms this season so far. It is definitely a bit bracing perched on top of a little Northern Hill. I would tell you the average wind speed in our garden but the recently purchased weather station was obliterated during the last storm.
Let’s just say it’s BREEZY and a tad DAMP.
The perfect time to put the recycling out for collection. I dread to think which country our cardboard is currently flying across.
It’s odd that you can live in a little bungalow for over 20 years and still feel completely lost when the lights cut out. The perfect time to test the various torches and battery lamps, because this newfangled piped electricity has proved a bit part time over the last few months. The other odd thing is the different perspective torch light gives on familiarity. Sat by myself in a king sized bed, in a room clearly made for two with half empty wardrobes, all illuminated by a cheap torch….
It shines a flickering, underpowered light on life and loss.
Lost in Bern. Sounds like a Bill Murray movie. Lost back in time. The three of us were trying to find our way to the Bear Park. Walking in never ending circles around the old city streets when an enticing ice cream parlour became way too tempting. Temptation is a slippery slope to ruin or in this case a slippery cafe floor. Carrying 3 ice creams and drinks was way beyond me and I went head over heels. The Muppet Dad was on the floor covered in various flavours of ice cream and coke.
An embarrassing silence descended on the busy cafe.
Silence broken by Hawklad who loudly announced “HE is not my Dad, I have never seen him ever before…”
He was 5 and already he knew me way too well.
Doing a bit of that alpine climbing.
Don’t get many of these around here. It’s a FORD. It’s about the only time my car gets a wash….
You can see the houses still have sandbags up against the front doors. These days this lovely village sadly suffers from floods way more frequently.
Parked up in a traffic queue waiting to cross a storm damaged bridge, I unfortunately got to listen to the NEWS. MOST Unfortunate as it involved listening to the Government Education Minister trying to explain why more and more pupils are not attending school. Record numbers. Apparently it’s down to a number of factors,
Bad parenting
Immigration
Really bad parenting
Not enough discipline
Truly awful parenting
Benefits culture
Liberal politics
Moral standards
Monumentally bad parenting
Not enough Parents being fined for letting the Country down. Well over a quarter of a million parent fines just isn’t enough….
I guess I am one of THOSE parents the system has a problem with. Well as ONE of those parents I was surprised that the School System and Government Education Policy wasn’t mentioned. No mention of school budget cuts. No mention of the complete collapse in Special Education Provision and Support. No mention of NHS Mental Health Services struggling to cope with the huge numbers of young people crying out for help. No mention of rising class sizes and overcrowded, unhealthy classrooms. No mention of crumbling school infrastructure. No mention of rising teacher workload and stagnant pay. No mention of increasing Government control of what is taught, how it’s taught, how it’s assessed. No mention of the fanatical focus on exam results and discipline. No mention of the drive towards Victorian Education Standards.
That’s a large ELEPHANT in the ROOM.
A small nature reserve on the edge of the nearest city.
Been coming here for over 20 years and I’ve never seen it this wet.
The small pond has suddenly decided to grow, there is supposed to be a wooden viewing platform there. In fact the now super pond has completely submerged the path on the far side. No circular nature walk now.
Impromptu streams forming all over the site.
The irony, just a few months back Yorkshire was officially under drought restrictions…..
A Dad trying to cope with the loss of his Partner and becoming a single parent. 