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Ice

Cold cold cold….

You know it’s cold when you can step across ice and not hear a single crack or ice groan. Even having gingerly tottered halfway and inevitably hitting the ice with the force of a giant meteor about to wipe out the dinosaurs…. not the slightest ice indent.

Now filled with unbounded hope and belief in that ice, I visioned the perfect opportunity to excel in life once more….. I can do this. Sprint like a cheetah, build up vast amounts of momentum, jump on the snow sledge and majestically sail across the mighty ice lake. The first human ever to successfully sledge from East to West on this huge swath of lake ice (sounds way better than a big pond)… A cold Yorkshire hill, the theatre of dreams…..The beauty and grace of Swan Lake seamlessly combined with the power and agility of an elite sporting superhero.

Once again reality rips asunder unfounded hope….

A few moments later I’m stranded halfway, now face down in the ice and with the sledge riding on top of me. Going nowhere, unable to even get any purchase on my limbs to get up.

Spreadeagled on ice….. That’s probably a video title from the very top row section of Blockbusters….

It took me 5 minutes to find dry land again. It’s incredibly emasculating to be basically pushed by your sniggering son, helplessly across the ice like a curling stone….

Bring on summer……

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 40 Comments

Boarded up

A few hardy souls braved a distinctly cold and windy Yorkshire beach.

Definitely felt like Autumn.

Definitely looked like Autumn. The small rides, the cafes, the ice cream vans had mostly all closed down and boarded up for the year. No more intrepid crazy golfers until next year.

I wonder what it feels like to be a resident here in Filey right now. Sadness that the summer season is over with the crowds departed OR relief to get their seaside town back again. The chance to walk quietly along the seafront again, to breathe.

I guess it’s a similar feeling that this time of year brings to our little hilltop village. With no village shop or school or pub or cafe. A church with only one service a month. It’s not unusual to not see another village soul for week upon week upon week. The short days, bleak weather and zero street lighting all ramp up the feelings. So what’s it going to be this time around. Peaceful solitude or suffocating isolation…..

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 43 Comments

searching for

The weather isn’t playing ball but the flowers have had enough, they are starting to bloom.

Just need the sun now….

It might be a bit of a wait for that ….

Excessive handwashing,

Excessive clothes changing,

Excessive need for reassurance,

Excessive need to order and arrange things,

Excessive need to check and recheck things,

Excessive hoarding.

I was told by a Paediatrician that OCD was one of the potential anxieties that we should look out for with Hawklad. As a toddler he was obsessed with lining toy animals and cars in increasingly long straight lines. Apparently that can be a forewarning of later life OCD and an early flag of Autism. The Paediatrician said for unknown reasons there is a link. I think he said that 2% of the population can experience severe OCD, for Autism the percentage jumps to 20%.

Whatever the reasons, whatever the numbers, OCD has a huge impact on daily life, it ramps up anxiety and stress levels. It does with Hawklad. If anything the OCD grows. Sadly up to now the advice and support with OCD can be best described by the phrase

Best of luck with that….

It’s often down to individuals and families to try to chart a path through these never ending storms. Trying to find ideas, anything to try.

The search is ongoing here.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 44 Comments

Groundhog

It’s still WINTER, no sign of SPRING…. YET.

Thanks to Bill Murray, we know it’s Groundhog Day today. Various Groundhogs seeing or not seeing SHADOWS, Six or NOT Six more weeks of winter. Looking at the various Groundhog Facebook videos emanating from across the States, there isn’t just one Master Hog these days. It’s like Boxing with its multiple champions across multiple sanctioning bodies. So might as well add another weather predicting body.

Unfortunately groundhogs are a bit scarce on the ground in Yorkshire.

So it’s HoundDog Day in Yorkshire.

Ok he isn’t a pure Hound Dog, more an accident between a randy Cocker Spaniel and an unsuspecting fluffy German Spitz. But needs most. Another problem, unlike Batman, this hero hasn’t sussed out the concept of shadows yet. Actually he hasn’t sussed out many concepts. Thankfully he has found the delights of SOCKS. So the 2024 winter forecast is based on will the nutter grab the long or shorter sock. Long winter or shorter winter.

And the results….

It’s a LONGER WINTER forecast.

Actually he then picked up the short sock. So what does a Long and Short sock mean. Where is Bill Murray when you need him.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 47 Comments

Cold Sea

A Yorkshire Seaside Holiday Resort in WINTER. During the Summer Bridlington would be mobbed but this cold, windy day, it was almost completely deserted. Most places boarded up for the off season and definitely NO pirate ship rides.

Apparently the bronze statue is of a young girl knitting a special jumper called a Gansey for a local fisherman.

Many many many years ago, as a child I would come here once a year. It was one of the very few big family day trips. Sixty miles from home. That was as far as we ventured most years, so it seemed like it was on the other side of the world. Now walking along the seafront and it looked almost unchanged from those childhood adventures. Half expected to see my parents coming to meet us laden with newspaper wrapped fish, chips and mushy peas.

Memories AGAIN.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 16 Comments

Frozen yoga

Definitely frozen and a poor swan forced to go on foot around the lake.

Definitely frozen as today’s morning yoga torture was performed in two pairs of leggings and three layers of fleece. Not really in the mood to ‘enjoy the deep grounding position’.

‘Let the head relax onto the inner thigh’, how can I relax when my thigh is convulsing like it’s been hit with a million volts and my neck sounds like it’s just snapped.

And how can I ‘with a lions breath transition smoothly onto the other side’ when I’m embarrassingly stuck with rigorous mortis rapidly setting in to my increasingly knackered and now badly deformed hip.

Apparently yoga is good for you….

It’s definitely good for letting things go. With me ‘a delicious downward dog’ is ‘my hairy backside ridiculously stuck in the air releasing fart after fart’….

Is it just me that yoga bullies….

At least I won’t need to take an ice bath to cool down.

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Snowdrops

The first flowers of 2022. Winter might not be over but it feels much more manageable now.

There is a local saying here – The first snowdrops bring the first real snow. We shall see but the sledge is ready to fly down the hill. One of the advantages of a large posterior is that once the sledge gets going, wow does it get going.

Sill waiting for the school week to get going. Hardly any work provided today but that means Hawklad can set his own learning agenda. It necessarily great for his exams but much better for his own development. So while he was learning about multi universe theory (that’s not the Marvel version) I could go outside. Outside on my hands and knees. Checking at the beautiful new arrivals. That definitely feels more satisfying than the usual Monday school lesson day.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 38 Comments

Leafless

Won’t be long before the trees are leafless.

Could be a long winter.

For the fourth day running, UK had the most new Covid Cases in the world. Our cases running at least 10x higher than our European neighbours. Averaging about a 1000 Covid deaths a week. Hospitals under huge pressure. 1 in 12 secondary school pupils testing positive.

Apparently our Plan A is still working. No need for mandatory masks . No need for additional measures. No need to speed up the vaccination programme. We are learning to live with Covid.

Are we really learning to live with Covid or is the Government just trying to ignore the inconvenience it causes them.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 41 Comments

Slope

The long and slightly winding road. It doesn’t look much but it’s a bit of a pull up that slope. Unsurprisingly this little lane blocks quickly when the snow arrives. One day I will pick up the courage to try to sledge this all the way to the bottom. Our very own Cresta Run.

At the bottom of the slope (if I make it that far) I then need to find 2 feet of lift and aim for this gap in the hedge. If I pull that manoeuvre off then I will continue the sledge run across at least one more field. Miss the gap or get no height and it’s going to hurt. Hurt lots…..

As Hawklad points out. He will let Dad go first, clear a path and then if Dad is able to stand without medical assistance, then he will follow. It’s good to know that I still have my uses. 🤪🤪🤪🤪

As the colder, darker months fast approach some of the things that kept both of us going over the warmer months will become harder to keep going. New hobbies and new things to do are really needed. Especially as there is no immediate sign of a breakout from our ongoing family isolation. But we need to keep living. Preferably things that don’t involve pain…

I was looking on eBay for a second hand telescope to help with Astronomy as something we could do together. One to replace my very old small scope. I found a potential option. 4 hours to go on bidding and after 3 bids the price was at £30 plus delivery. That’s great for a £900 telescope. I made the offer. £35…. It was mine…. until 5 minutes before the auction closed. Two minutes later budding was at £300.. Pants. Didn’t bother seeing what it finally went for. Not this time.

But I feel better as I have done something. I’ve tried. Now what other random items can I find. What weird hobbies might open up.