It’s terrible poetry time again curtesy of Chelsea Owens. This week the impeachment case rules are as follows
- Anyone who knows me knows I love Half-Priced Chocolate Day (February 15th) more than the holiday the day before -BUT, this is the Terrible Poetry Contest! Nothing gets poemed to death more than the topic of ❤LOVE!❤
So, the Topic is LOVE LOVE LOVE! Write me a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad sonnet. Give me alliterations, adjectives, allegories, and aneurysms.
- Keep the Length long enough to capture your love’s interest without putting her to sleep.
- Rhyming? Up to you, but I recommend you do.
- Make it terrible! Cupid needs to pull out the real arrows after catching wind of your attempts.
- Keep the rating PGish.
You have till 8:00 a.m. MST next Friday (February 7) to submit a poem to Chelsea.
Bearing in mind I’m about to publish a post basically venting my spleen on the horrors of Valentines Day – keeping to PGish may prove beyond me. But he goes let’s see if I can find my inner terribleness.
Missing the warmth of your dear sweet love
Valentines goes on which annoys me, kind of
Feeling unloved as our romance is no more
Will get as many cards as a grumpy Wild Boar
No red roses for me sat on my sofa for one
No lovers wine to drink as I’m suffering a dry run
Can’t even have chocolate as I’m currently dairy free
So sat here writing of love with a bloody black tea
Trying to find ways to avoid pigging Valentines Day
Maybe games of solitaire and a stinging nettle bouquet
Mr Grouchy sat here with love sadly deserting me
Nursing a snotty nose and an annoying sore old knee
So Valentines is coming and I’m enduring all those red rose adverts
Well excuse me if I say to me it’s all a huge pile of steaming turds.