For a few years we sometimes would talk about ‘what if’.  We were both relatively healthy and sort of young.  Bad things didn’t happen to us and if they did we would get time to plan.  So we just kept putting things off.  We never got round to getting married (my fault).

The world changed in days and we never got that time to plan.

Subsequently it’s been a nightmare trying to unpick the finances and sort out everything surrounding the will.  That’s time I should have spent focusing on our son.  Financial assistance for the bereaved is available, but it’s all focused on married couples.  You end up feeling like a second class citizen. You can go to some dark places when you lose someone the last thing you need is “you should have for married” line.


3 thoughts on “If only

  1. Nick and I were together 23 years. He asked me to marry him on June 7, 1996
    We married March 20, 2016 …. just 4 months and 2 days before he died.
    It saved a LOT of legal work and problems.


      1. We always make the mistake of thinking there is enough time. Nick had already been married twice. I had been married once. We didn’t want that piece of paper to come between us….we’d seen it happen so many times….we were happy the way we were.


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