I was sent a report to read this morning. I couldn’t work out what it meant when it said D.A. and FUWSM. When I phoned to ask, the report sender was really apologetic as they were local office acronyms. Apparently Diagnosis Awaited and Follow Up Within Six Months.

I went for a run today and a white van passed with B.O.N.G down the side. What could that mean. All I could think of was something to do with a Kangaroo.

This got me thinking about acronyms. We seem to get more of these pesky things everyday. I have come across a few I really like:

LMAO – Laughing My Arse Off. Someone much wiser than me introduced this to me. I really like this one. I might not like it so much if an employer said that after they read my job application.

TIFU – Today I Fudged Up. Maybe the F stands for something else, can’t think of anything currently.

TMI – Too Much Information. I fancy having that tattooed on my forehead.

NOYB – Non of Your Business. I fancy having that tattooed to my bottom.

LOL – Lots of Love. Thinking about it could also be Laugh Out Loud.

But some acronyms I either don’t get or I just think they sound odd. Some notable ones include:

FTW – For The Win. I once had a football coach who would continually shout ftw ftw ftw …. why couldn’t he just say win please.

ICYMI – In Case You Missed It. How on Earth are you supposed to remember that one. It’s only practical use is to employ someone with a big ICYMI sign and have the sign pointing at my tattooed rear.

TWAT – The War Against Terror. Controversial project and not an acronym you can use if your mum is in the room.

Acronyms do have had a habit of causing trouble. I once worked for an organisation which went through a merger process. The merger project team was called TRTHMG. I never found out what that stood for. My Finance Team had to be combined with the other organisations Budgeting Department. The TRTHMG decided on a new name for combined team. Unbelievably they came up with Transitional User Resource Department. So for 6 months I could walk round with T.U.R.D on my name badge.

Not sure why but I qualified as an accountant, maybe I craved excitement. Anyway I got to put CPFA after my name. Strangely this could stand for the Canadian Pigeon Fanciers Association. But for years I thought that my CV proudly displayed these letters after my name. Unfortunately I recently discover that my spell checker must have at some stage auto corrected it to CACA. No wonder I never got many job offers.

While we are on the subject of auto correction my last thought has to go to a time when I was doing some work for a Police Force. I sent a report to the four senior Police Officers in the area. I blame a faulty auto corrector as the report ended up being sent to the Arse Commanders.


81 thoughts on “Acronyms

  1. I cracked up at the T.U.R.D acronym at your job. You’d think somebody along the hierarchy of the organization would pause and say, “hey, have you noticed what Transitional User Resource Department spells?” ๐Ÿ˜‚

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Hahaha…I laughed a lot at the T.U.R.D. and CACA as well! I am so lost in acronym world – I am so thankful for Google because I have to ask a lot of “what does this mean?” ๐Ÿ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  3. A friend used to be a quality inspector for Cessna, a company that makes planes. He would regularly see alt. and jump the person using since alt. can stand for several different things.

    A different friend used an acronym on Facebook and I used an acronym website. It gave me 119 possible choices. I asked her which one and she stayed quiet which led me to believe it was the only acronym that was Not Suitable For Work (NSFW).

    I used to only explain an acronym or abbreviation in the first post I used it and not in later posts. At some point, I realized the first post readers see may not be the first place I defined the acronym/abbreviation. For a while now, I define the acronym/abbreviation in each new post.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes they are fine as long as the other person realises what it means. During the merger the receptionist would send a boring looking email out to everyone in the building ending with DHOS. It was a warning saying the new bosses had arrived, D***head on Site.


  4. Did like the B.O.N.G. It reminded me of a video clip on our local news recently of two very large male kangaroos having a major punch up on a residential street in Adelaide, South Australia. The local residents and cars were steering well clear of them.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. You missed your vocation. When I worked at the 2012 Olympics we had a book of acronyms to get us through the day. Life is indeed a four letter acronym. It was the terror of turning my childโ€™s initials into an unfortunate TURD-esque acronym that meant it took us four days to decide on a name. Thereโ€™s now this reverse acronysing (I made that up, your welcome) where words are used to create an acronym that means something else. So when my daughter described her boss as a โ€˜See You Next Tuesdayโ€™ kind of guy it took me a while to work out what she meant….

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Haha I like those!
    Participation in a Central Risk Assessment Committee had me attending CRAC meetings for a while – probably not something you should admit to in public.
    As for mothers, I had to explain to mine what FFS stands for recently – oops!

    Liked by 1 person

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