Two days ago it was 34C and cloudless. Today we are back to jumpers, rain and mist. Again the weather matches my mood.
Today I am missing my partner more than usual. Maybe it’s because we are starting to approach the fateful anniversary. Maybe it’s the weather. Maybe it’s 2 hours sleep last night. One thing it is most definitely not to do with is our son. As ever he is the shining light. The only thing that keeps me going.
So as he is watching ScoobyDoo and the Witch’s Ghost my mind is wandering. Not only am I missing her so much there is something else. I am still enjoying parenting today but I’m not enjoying being a single parent today. Does that make sense?
- Nobody is there to tell you that are doing some parenting thing right or wrong.
- Nobody is there to give you a hug.
- Nobody is there to give you that knowing smile.
- After son goes to bed nobody to snuggle up with to watch a movie.
- Nobody is there to share a quiet moment with.
- Nobody is there is ever to make you a cup of coffee.
- Nobody to cover while you pop out for that bottle of milk or a bag of flour which you have just run out of.
- Nobody to calm me down when I am about to throttle the hoover as the belt snaps again.
- No more holding hands.
- Nobody to share that special moment together when our son does something magical.
Don’t get me wrong parenting is still the most rewarding thing I will ever do. Maybe I need to write a post about the upside. It is the best gig in the world. Just somedays it’s a bit tougher than usual and certainly more lonely than I envisioned all those years ago.