Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 47 Comments

Mixed

Another one of those school at home days for Hawklad. Two lessons fully made available and with in lesson email support. Can’t fault that support at all. Then two lessons with absolutely nothing. No support. No classroom material. No idea what the class did.

Yesterday was a similar picture. One complete lesson with full classroom support. One lesson with some documents shared but no support. Then two ghost lessons. Absolutely nothing. Complete radio silence.

That creates kind of a problem. In some subjects Hawklad is keeping up with the class. But in other subjects repeated missing or incomplete lessons will eventually take its toll. He will fall behind. With no prospect of him returning any time soon the issues with certain subjects will grow. A time will come when he can’t make up the gap.

It’s a real concern. I’ve spoken to school, but these are such challenging times for schools. I guess it’s just making the best of it for the moment. Hanging in there until Hawklad is able to return or he opts out of school teaching permanently.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 44 Comments

Problematic

A brief few moments of blue sky before the Yorkshire mist and drizzle rolled back in. It was nice will it lasted.

I received an email from school today informing parents that a pupil had tested positive for Covid. The pupil has been sent home and a further 20 pupils have been asked to self isolate. The concern is that the pupil had no symptoms and it can’t be established how long they had been infectious for. It is entirely possible that the in-school test last week provided an inaccurate all clear result.

Can’t say I’m entirely disappointed that Hawklad is currently at home.

But it’s sometimes not the easiest of options.

Did we have a hockey stick. Did we have a hockey ball. Kind of made hockey practice a little problematic….

Did we have any graph paper. Had the printer run out of ink. Kind of made detailed and accurate graph work a little problematic…..

Could we find a working green pen. Kind of made self marking work (if it’s not done in green then it’s additional marks deducted) a little problematic…..

Could we find the video showing the science experiment. Kind of made writing about the results a little problematic…..

Trying to keep a full, overcrowded school open based on solely on unreliable Covid self tests is a little problematic…..

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 63 Comments

Let’s set the record straight

It’s amazing how dealing with just a couple of work emails can send me heading towards the chocolate jar and thinking fondly of getting marooned on a tropical island with absolutely ZERO internet connectivity.

I needed to relax.

What better way than dig out a bit of vinyl and listen to music. I love music BUT not enough to carefully categorise and sort the LPs into any meaningful order. Preferring the random, hotchpotch approach. So this afternoon I opened one of the storage cases and grabbed 3 records. Let’s see what musical treats came my way.

First off a definite blast from my long hair, rocker past. I think most teenage rocking males of my generation would claim to have at least one Pat Benatar album somewhere in the bedroom.

Then an odd LP. Sometimes you buy because you love the band. Sometimes you buy because of the music. Then other times you buy because it’s a cool looking picture disc.

Then finally arguably my most random records. When I was 12 I jumped on a plane for the first time. Headed for my only trip so far to the Southern Hemisphere. To visit my big sister who had emigrated to South Africa. A month in Pretoria and Johannesburg. A staggeringly beautiful yet scary and incomprehensible Apartheid dominated land. My sister lived in an area which was still to have a functioning television service. So they listened to the radio, played records and at weekends either went to the cinema drive-in or hired a movie reel and played it on the noisy home super 8 projector.

My sister always seemed to play one record back then. IPI TOMBI. A show featuring traditional indigenous South African music. Fast forward many years and I was at a car boot sale in deepest Yorkshire. Guess what I found. Brings back so many memories.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 33 Comments

Abstract

Let’s be honest, it’s not really sunbathing weather here in Yorkshire. It’s ‘let’s see how many layers of clothes I can squeeze under the down jacket before it bursts at the seems’ weather.

“Go on then Dad, can you see it”

What is that supposed to be again.

“It’s an abstract artist’s interpretation of what our market town looks like.”

No that’s not really jumping into my brain that interpretation.

“What do you see then Dad.”

A series of random line squiggles and odd shapes. Forming what can only be described as a incoherent mess.

“Exactly Dad. Apparently that’s the town skyline and its most iconic landmarks.”

Really. If it’s most iconic landmarks then I’m certainly not seeing traffic jams, floods, not open at weekend signs, pizza takeouts and hordes of parking enforcement officers.

“Dad, Aspergers clearly doesn’t get abstract art…”

It’s ok Hawklad, Dads don’t get it as well.

“I’ve got to produce my own version of that now. Really…”

Shall we just put a pot of ink and a piece of paper in with the gerbils and let them get creative.

“Would be a good idea but the gerbils eat everything in front of them”

“Well you can help me do it.”

Ok do you want me to draw as well.

“No I‘ve seen your artistic skills. Look at the state of my hair. No you can do something your better at.”

Ok you name it.

“Go and find some chocolate for me please”

I can do that…

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 101 Comments

Fan mail.

It’s been a while but I seem to have upset someone again. A couple of comments from my own country. So to my new fan I am certainly not thankful for everything Boris is doing for us. I hear you, I think.

Our schools are open again. Brexit is the best thing we have ever done, We are free of Europe. We control our borders again. We are safer. We have beaten Covid. Apparently I’m a ‘trumped up lefty’, ‘a European lover’ and ‘I need to get my head out of my ****”. IF I don’t like it then ‘I should sod off to France’.

Sadly if you hadn’t of sworn I might not have accidentally blocked you.

Ok I’m probably a bit left of centre. Definitely think of myself as European. And I probably would sod off to Europe if I could. Unfortunately your beloved Brexit has just made that virtually impossible. So I’m actually kind of with you so far. But sorry I don’t share your view on anything else. Thanks to Boris we have the most corrupt Government we’ve had in centuries. We have some of the highest Covid death rates in the world. Our care homes were forsaken by his government in their our of need. Thousands died. We’ve had spikes in death rates directly correlated to decisions from Boris. Brexit is a shambles and killing off large parts of the economy. Our countries civil rights are being undermined because of Boris. He’s turned his back on the Grenfall Tower survivors. He’s refused to take action on all the other dangerous High Rise buildings. He’s repeatedly turned his back on the family’s in this country who are in food poverty. He’s slashed the overseas aid budget.

So no I don’t think we will ever agree. We shall continue to dream for really different countries. I’m never going to sign up to yours. That’s never going to happen.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 40 Comments

Are we really happy about this

It’s still not even midday on this stormy Monday and it already feels like it’s been a long week. Much shaking my head at the areas and topics Hawklad is having to learn. Really how will these facts and skills set him up for the future.

Then he listens to the news. It’s filled with talk of pandemics, nepotism and a country rapidly appearing to be an inwardly looking police state. Women having to protest because they don’t feel safe. A complete and utter Brexit shambles. Ongoing environmental disasters. Lots of waving the flag and saying we are better than anyone else. Look how much we can blame on immigration. Everything has a price. Profit is king. A world where the makeover of the PMs flat is more important than a pay rise for nurses. Leaders talking about bringing Victorian values back into schools.

Hawklad hears this. He talks about this.

Are we really happy that our children are being exposed to this. Being brought up in this type of world. Learning this stuff. Are we happy that the likes of these people are in charge of our child’s education.

Deciding exactly what they learn, how they learn it, where they can source there information from. What part of the economy they can be slotted in to.

Is it really about the children or is just about the economy. If it is really about the children then why don’t we ask them what they want. What interests them. What works for them. What world do they want to grow up in.

I bet it’s not this type of world….

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Vigil

Yesterday our Police cracked down on a peaceful candle lit vigil. A vigil where everyone in the crowd was wearing a mask. Cracked down on an outpouring of public grief. A show of solidarity with the basic right of every woman to be safe on our streets. Arrests were forcibly made. The reason – to comply with Government Covid Rules. The demonstration represented a public health risk. Even though it was outside and masked.

In 8 hours schools will be open. Lessons will be inside, in poorly ventilated, cramped rooms and largely unmasked. This apparently does not represent a public health risk. Parents are threatened with legal action from the Government if they fail to send their children into school.

My country has become a dangerously messed up place to live. The priorities of those in charge becoming more warped by the minute. Later this week the Government plans to go further and crack further down on protests. Even single person protests.

The tide has to change before more good people are hurt.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 47 Comments

Ray of sunshine

We all need those little Rays of Sunshine. Those wonderful people and things in life that never fail to lift you up. That always make you smile. That remind you just how good life can be. The best evidence that it can be a Wonderful Life.

I checked the work email system this morning. Thankfully not for long. Just 6 emails. Two boring ones. A couple of routine questions. That left two…..

One started off saying “why do I have to do that job with XXXXX, he is a T**t.” That piece of Shakespearean sonnet continued in a similar vain for 10 more lines.

The other email was an equally uplifting piece of thespian prose. Basically it was taking great delight in pointing out a mistake made by another member of staff. Carefully sent to everyone in the organisation.

Deep joy. I’ve so missed work. But this morning I’m able to just brush off those emails. I’m still smiling. Smiling thanks to those little Rays of Sunshine.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 61 Comments

This time

I can’t blame him for these, this time. But it does explain why he keeps coming in the house with muddy paws.

I had a post yesterday about Autism. When I wrote it things seemed ok with it. But then something happened. I happened….

I’m still working through this pcurrent bout of depression. Won’t be the first or last time I do this. When depression becomes DEPRESSION with me I start to doubt myself. Question my worth. That’s what happened yesterday. I reread the post and didn’t like it. The words were wrong. Uncertain of the message. Why was I bothering. If people want to read about Autism and Autism Patenting then they would be so much better off going to other blogs. Go to a blog like Robyn’s wonderful one. Nothing I said could change my mind. The voices in my would not be satisfied until I deleted the post. Eventually that is what happened.

Today the voices are not so strong. I guess today the post would have had a slightly better chance of being published. With my depression it comes in waves. Bad days then better days. Will be that way until I finally get on top of this run of D. In the meantime I will plod on. Trying to not listen to the voices in my head too much. Focusing on those things in my life which bring joy and happiness.

I can do this

We can do this.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 68 Comments

Pruning

That tree did need pruning…. Saves me a job.

Problem is that now the gardener wants to bring his new toy into the house. Must be a gardener thing. But I bet the branch would last longer than his last toy. The unbreakable dog toy that lasted 10 minutes.

Which all explains why I’ve just noticed in the corner of the living room a very well chewed branch. I guess we can call it a bit of Art Deco.