That hedge needs trimming……

Hawklad likes to think that this bush has become so large and overgrown, that if it was one day cut then it might destabilise the earths orbit. Better not touch it then. That’s what I call a quality excuse to avoid hard work. A few minutes later it was absolutely chucking it down. At least we got a few minutes sun.

Well that dreaded day has arrived. Been trying to put it off. Yes Hawklad is now taller than me. Certainly if you include the hair…. Even discounting hair then he is now above me. Waiting till he was 15 or 16 would have been nice. But only just gone 13 – really….

I was happy at 5ft10.5 (179cm). I was just above average height. Yes a few more inches might have given my goalkeeping career a boost, but I was cool with my height. I was the tallest in our family. But deep down I knew my title would be lost. Especially when Hawklad was 9 and the Doctor told him that he was above the 97th percentile for height at his age. 97th is always going to tower over something like the 51st.

Now to work on his weight. He is tall but very slim. He struggles to maintain his weight. He’s underweight for his age and height. That’s a label that I have never, ever had. In the words of his Doctor – if he wants to eat chocolate then let him, no need for calorie counting, just eat…. It maybe that he is always moving, brain always in overdrive. It’s something I have to keep an eye on. Evidence is rising on the link between Autism and eating disorders. He is conscious of his weight but thinks he is overweight. He does love eating salads and vegetables. I need to find ways to get more calories in him in a sustainable way.

At the moment we are probably just about maintaining a balanced approach, but only just. I don’t want to make light of this. Many families and adults are so struggling with eating disorders, which too often end tragically. Much more needs to be understood and done. We will treat this so seriously and will continue to look at options. In our case the best approach often involves humour, so…. So maybe a better baker than me is required in our house. That’s something Hawklad would sign up to.

81 thoughts on “Needs trimming

  1. Yes, I feel even more hobbit like now at 5′ 2″ It runs in my family. My mom is a hobbit and my grandma was a hobbit. I have a niece who is a hobbit too. I recal my great-grandma having a bit more height. What happened?

    I hate to hear that Hawklad struggles to maintain his weight. ๐Ÿ˜ You know that I’ll add that to my prayers as well.

    Liked by 2 people

      1. I never thought that Boromir had a strange accent. Never. I have no idea what to say about the hobbit comment. ๐Ÿ˜€


      2. ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ Yes, but Frodo was forever climbing that mountain, looking like life was draining the life out of him. Okay, I’m going for my walk now. Catch ya later Superdad. Up up and away.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I have had you in my head when I head out to do the yardwork or weeds. “Just five minutes a day!” It has turned into, “Just five minutes each time you are out here,” which is about twice a week, and things aren’t perfect, but they are better. In terms of weeds, well, those suckers suck. I pick them each week and they have the audacity to keep coming back. Jerks. Your son is my Catelyn. Last weekend everyone commented on “Oh my gosh, look at how tall she is!” But as she grows in height, she is still not gaining anything in weight. She’s still a 00 in pants and XS in everything else. She does not like anything healthy, and is frequently found eating sprinkles from the container with a spoon. I do not want to get into her head about her weight, you are right, I fear creating an eating disorder. I can just keep trying to help her be healthy, like you do for your son. Good luck!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It does make a difference but those pesky weeds come back again and again. Iโ€™m going to try vinegar on them. Itโ€™s such a delicate situation. You must be so anxious with Catelyn. I remember seeing a photo of her playing soccer, she looked tall then. Is she full of energy?


  3. Isobelle is 16, taller than the rest of the family, and underweight. She never ate lunch at school, whether packed or canteen food. She has to be reminded, and anything different she has no appetite.

    Liked by 2 people

      1. It took my daughter so many years to get the diagnosis. I helped them pay for extra tuition, and an eye specialist, as none were covered. So pleased that she got her statement.


  4. I wonder if Hawklad has too many “full” hormones. Even though I’ve frequently said, “I’m not hungry, but I’m never full.”, I didn’t believe in a chemical trigger till I was on Fen/Phen… only taking the pill that is not speed. I experienced satiety for literally the first, and only, time in my life. I remember remarking, “this must be how normal people feel about food!” I haaaate that the pill was banned!!

    Sorry you’re now the shorty in the house!!

    Any excuse not to do yardwork is a good excuse!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Gahhhhh!!

        California seems to be trying to give a lot of consideration to how to best assist kids with learning disabilities, including those who do not speak English.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. I seriously hope that Ben is not taller than me. At 6′ tall I’ve gotten used to being tallest. Ben’s father is about the same as Daughter, about 5’9″, so fingers crossed, I keep my title of tallest!

    Ben was extremely underweight from always moving moving moving until he started meds. Now he’s slightly overweight. We know how difficult it is with a restricted list of acceptable foods to get our kiddos to eat healthy.

    Can I call you “shorty” since I’m taller than you?๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ I’ll bet Hawklad is tickled pink that he’s taller. Must make him smile and that’s awesome

    Liked by 2 people

      1. As the saying goes… “anything except late for dinner”๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚
        Seriously though… such a question… my first answers were NOT family friendly… I’ve got a bit (maybe more than a bit) of a naughty streak in me๐Ÿ™Š๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

        Liked by 1 person

  6. My brother is really tall, just a bit over 6,and I’m just a bit over 5. The women in my family tend to be short, and the guys really tall. My brother eats really well, because he has too. When he was a teenager, he had a lot of fainting spells, it was quiet scary. Your son might also get nose bleeds, during summer >.<. So a lot of vegetables, they may not like it, but he will need all the good energy he can get. Sun, when he can,lol. In the UK that's probably easier said than done,lol. Speak to a dietitian though. What worked for my brother may not work for your boy.
    Funny thing is, now my brother is not growing up anymore, but he is growing out,lol.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I know, I’ve got a story for everything. That’s what comes with living on the edges of society, there are just so many things to experience than most homebody’s could ever imagine. And they’re all true in some way, just with embellishments.
    This story was real, without embelllishment. Summer holidays, end of grade 5. June. I was the shortest kid in class. Skinny as a rail. Every bully in school or out knew where I lived, and they fought for who was going to bully me on any given day. Fist-fight fought. Bloody knuckles and all, and I paid for every drop of blood spilled by the winner. I hope that’s a pretty vivid picture. I spent the summer as every previous summer, trying to avoid pissing my father off but never succeeding. Trying to avoid the bullies who held empire over me. I learned my home city, Winnipeg, by watlking over it, north to south, east to west. Getting up in the morning before everyone else, packing a sandwich, and going for a walk that would end around supper. I knew more about Winnipeg than any taxi driver.
    Suddenly September, and back to school. The only warning was an overheard comment from my mother, the boy is growing like a weed. I had to get all new clothes for school for grade 6. No hand-me-downs that year. No one had told me in three months I had grown almost a foot, and was suddenly the tallest person in my large family of ten kids and still two adults at that time. I was also the tallest kid in my grade at school. Since it was the last year of elementary, I was the tallest kid in school. But I had put on not an ounce of weight. I was so skinny if you saw me from the side a broom handle was thicker than me. Please don’t think the bullies disappeared, they didn’t. Now I was a 5’11” target, totally uncoordinated, not even able to run away anymore.
    Anyways aside from the bullies and the abusive father, does any of this sound familiar, Gary? Hawklad reminds me of me.
    The gist of the matter is, by the end of autumn I was eating like a horse. I had beefed up to being the school’s 97 lb. weakling. Everyone kicked sand in my face, even the girls. But nature took its course, and now I am just like most other guys, overweight, and no longer skinny. Watch out for what you wish for, Gary. Allow Hawklad to develop on his own. His body will determine what he needs to eat, not some fancy dietician.
    Me, I wanted to be a professional football player, Canadian football. I was the perfect receiver, tall, fast, arms that hung past my knees. I could take balls right out of the fingers of other players without coming too near them. But I weighed only 140 lbs when I was 18. The football coach laughed at me when I told him my dream. I’d have to put on another 50 lbs to survive being tackled by 200 lb. linebackers. But nothing I did could put on weight. Until I put on double my weight in one year, and I became too heavy to run. I waver around 1 to 1.1 kilos now. I will never be skinny again. If only I had known.


  8. I am the shorty … with exception of daughter but she is right there… boys tower over me… I am 5โ€™7โ€

    I am also the shortest child, between my brother and sister who both are much taller than me. My brother being the tallest.

    I am taller than my mom though – she is 5โ€™5โ€

    I used to have a problem keeping weight on… you think that sounds awesome but it isnโ€™t when you struggle to put weight on and it wonโ€™t. I do ok now… it has leveled out … I had Gravesโ€™ disease (thyroid condition, makes you lose weight and not put any on)

    They used to tell me to eat anything I wanted and wanted me to do those protein powders ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ yeah no I didnโ€™t like that.

    I can still eat whatever I want and not worry or think about weight… has never been a problem…

    But after cancer – I eat way healthier now.

    Although ONE thing makes me gain weight lol… and that would be Oreos lol… the MEGA stuffed ones … not sure why … I do not eat them but they will make me gain a few pounds… buy him Oreos lol โœŒ๏ธ

    Liked by 1 person

      1. ๐Ÿ˜ฎ oh wow! I donโ€™t why I think they are worldwide? Lol … they are Oreos – how do you keep that from the world!!?? Get the mega stuffed ones!! You want ALL the filling lol โœŒ๏ธ๐Ÿ˜„

        My daughter likes to dip them in milk ๐Ÿฅ› ๐Ÿ˜ … somehow I made a cookie dipper โœŒ๏ธ

        I like to twist them apart… I go for the creamy filling first!! Omg yes Oreos – yum!!!

        My mom used to get mad when I was little cause I would twist them open, eat all the insides and not eat the cookie lol – when she threatened not to buy them anymore ๐Ÿ˜‘ … then I ate the cookie lol … still go for the cream first!!!

        You have them now though right?

        Liked by 1 person

  9. Boy, does the lord like peeing on you from on high. Salads etc are great but not for putting on weight and eating disorders are terrible things, the balance between your own anxiety. living with it, getting someone to eat and finding things, is somewhat difficult, although i know you do make a lot of stuff and make light of it too, whether that is a way to keep him involved?? Maybe.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. My eldest son at 16 had not had his growth spurt. He had a couple of trials with Arsenal as a goalkeeper and was told he was too short. He grew to 6’2″ and settled for semi pro Southern league for a while.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. My daughter is 11 and almost my height. She too is in 97th percentile for height. And 3rd for weight. Which is a bit of a worry. All the calories go into her height! She hates being underweight and always checking calories and going for highest option but itโ€™s hard as she has terrible gastro issues.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Eating issues are extremely complex and emotionally charged. He is very tall for his age which makes it tougher to gain weight. I do think the autism/aspergers aspect is a huge factor both with respect to rigidity and also the excess activity for some children, both in brain and movement. Over the years I have worked with many children with eating disorders or difficulties and I know all the advice and the things to do and not do. When it came to my own children, it all went out the window. My eldest was so fussy and had a really restricted range of foods, but I still carried on applying all the strategies that had a big โ€˜noโ€™ sign above them. I really hope you find a way to increase calories. Is he a milkshake fan?

    Liked by 1 person

      1. My best friendโ€™s son has cystic fibrosis. He needs a hugely calorific diet and she has struggled since he was a toddler. He can eat anything, the more calorific and full of fat the better. He just doesnโ€™t want it. The more she offered, the less he tried. Itโ€™s been a huge challenge. He has improved but sadly needed a gastrostomy to help support. He hates chocolate or the things we all crave and shouldnโ€™t eat. The psychology of eating is a fascinating and frustrating thing for sure. X

        Liked by 1 person

      1. Start off small and simple… if he truly enjoys eating the fruits of his labor heโ€™ll be inspired to do more. Do you have the show Kids Baking Championship there? My daughter loves that show…๐Ÿ’•

        Liked by 1 person

  13. Wow, he is very tall for his age. It is stunning how they rocket all of a sudden. My daughter is about my height (5 ft 7 inches). But both of my sons are really tall. My youngest son is the tallest of the family with 6 ft 4 inches), he is 17.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. We could do a long-distance baking exchange.
    How about you sending that crumble you made to us…
    …and we’ll send some profiteroles and a couple of giant chocolate eclairs?

    Liked by 1 person

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