There are some problems that are beyond the human mind and there are many questions beyond the muppet dad mind. I’m not talking the deep metaphysical stuff. Not talking cosmology. I’m talking about those run of the mill problems.
How to set the timer on the microwave,
Why don’t I put a long sleeve shirt on when pulling up nettles,
Why did I pick Newcastle United to support,
Why do I keep putting clothes into the dishwasher,
Having bought at least 20 tablet pens, why can I never find just one when I need it,
Why do you only get holes in the socks that are still matching pairs,
Why does my mobile phone never hit the ground when it has its protective case on,
Where do all those batteries I buy end up hiding,
Why do I always miss my mouth while drinking hot chocolate and when I’ve got a white shirt on…..
But most perplexing of all to me is what is the best way to get into a beanbag. Remember I have a ‘not what it was’ type of body. Do I lower myself in using the adjacent furniture. Do I roll into it as if I’m a giant sausage roll. Or do I fall into it like a skydiver with a defective parachute. It’s all beyond me. Especially when I’m trying to get into the beanbag while carrying a cup of decaf coffee and an iPad. So far that has priced beyond me. I’ve even tried putting the coffee cup down next to the beanbag before trying to sit down. All that achieved was me kicking it all over the floor in the maelstrom that was my beanbag entry.
It’s all beyond me….