Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 37 Comments

Age

We live at the very edge of the hills around here. Never high. No way mountainous. But definitely hilly. No flat bits really. Yet being on the edge, just a few moments later you can find yourself in the flat lands. Mile after mile of exercise heaven. No slopes….

When life opens up again for me I should really jog here, not in those pesky hills.

I did that age thing today. I was doing my daily workout. It was going well. Really well. Towards the end I started messing about. Doing some serious exercise moves. Lifting some silly weights. Really pushing myself. Pushing my body like it’s still was 25…

It’s most certainly is not these days.

It’s the wrong side of 50. Well definitely the wrong side in terms of physique. It feels a few too many days like ‘I’ve used this body up now, can I have a new one please’. Yet I still push it. There are reasons but sometimes it does feel like I just forget my age. Still think I’m a lot younger. When the penny does drop sometimes it does hit home.

With exercise, age has changed me. I am definitely a little slower at running. I have to push way to hard to get close to the times I would get 30 years ago. A little more injury prone. But then I’m actually stronger now. Never lifted heavier or done more reps. It’s not about limiting myself, it’s more about making adjustments. Changing the balance.

Here’s the thing, being older can be good in some ways. I wish I knew a fraction about life when I was 25 that I do now. I certainly know the value of time and the importance in trying to live life to the full. For the first time I truly understand who I am and what is truly important to me. I would hope I’m a better, more rounded person. I can still dream, dream well. I just need to get better at sometimes being a little more realistic with those dreams, certainly as the years hopefully wrack up. Dream and aspire definitely yes but maybe some things need to get assigned to pipe dream status, leave them for other people to fulfill.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 28 Comments

Independent

Here’s an independent soul. A pain to catch in Pokemon Go this morning. Definitely independent.

When I managed public sector procurements and groups. Independent meant INDEPENDENT. If I broke those rules I would be sacked and if serious enough prosecuted. I knew a few people who ended up in prison for not being independent in public office.

The BBC has a management body that basically runs the company. Determines its approach to news. Is supposed to ensure it’s impartiality. For years that largely worked. That’s why BBC News was so valued internationally.

This week the Government appointed a new member to the BBC Board. A person who has worked for the ruling Conservative Party at a high level. He also happens to be the brother of the current Government Minister for Schools. Remember him, he was the one who said kids taking time off for bereavement were having ‘extended holidays’. He joins on the Independent BBC Board the Government appointed chairman of the BBC who has previously donated £400000 to the Conservative Party. He also joins another appointee who was a Conservative Party Counsellor.

Then on top of that the Government tried to put a very controversial Newspaper Friend in charge of the countries independent Media Regulator. That failed but there is always a way. The person put in charge was less controversial but is the wife of the former editor and political commentator of the biggest Conservative backing newspaper.

Independence……

A much missed quality these days here.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 60 Comments

Islands

Three years since I last stood here. Lindisfarne, a tidal island off the Northumberland coast of North Eastern England . Otherwise known as Holy Island. A place with a rich religious heritage dating back to 635AD.

It’s such a beautiful and evocative place. We would regularly visit here as a couple, as a small family and now as a family of two.

Saint Aidan came from Iona to found a monastery here. Iona is a small island of the western coast of Scotland. He must have liked wind and rain. Shall we say both islands are a tad exposed.

It’s a place I’ve always wanted to move to. Cut off from mainland for large parts of the day. Feels like you are surrounded by the vast open water on all sides. No escape from the unique feel and smell of the sea. A great place to think and breathe.

Not great for the waste. I would live off Fish and Chips…..

I’m talking about this as my mind wandered today. Hawklad is getting older. Won’t be many years before he is 18. Where did that time go. If he’s Independent then MAYBE I will need to find a new place to live. He’s always talked about never moving. So it might be be packing the bags. How knows maybe the bags will head here.

But it’s such a feeling. Such a big step. The thought of potentially starting again

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 24 Comments

Time slips by

Time does slip by. Sometimes as fast as those clouds wizzing across the Yorkshire sky.

As a kid one of the things I wanted to be was an Astronomer. I remember the look on the career advisors face when I would mention that. It was definitely a ‘that ain’t happening so stop being silly’ kinda look. Actually the career advisor only ever had a few options to suggest. Work in the local steel works, work in the local chemical plant, work in a factory, work in a shop, join the army or the truly gifted might even pushed towards a job in the local bank branch.

Ok no Astronomy job did turn up. But I did eventually buy myself a small telescope. But the Yorkshire clouds, sleep and then parenting restricted the times it was used.

The telescope is still with me. Battered and a bit out of focus. Now is that describing the scope or its user….. If I’m not using the scope much so there is no point buying a better one. But I did set myself a goal of using it a bit more over the winter months. When the skies get darker for longer. The best time to gaze up.

Time slips by….

That telescope has not been out all winter. I thought about it a few times but there was always an excuse. There was always a tomorrow. Now winter has gone.

Time slips by….

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 53 Comments

Mission Impossible

Tom Cruise has been filming some scenes for the latest Mission Impossible movie about 15 miles away from here. Doing the usual spy capers….fighting on top of a speeding steam train.

Usually he’s trying to save the world from apocalypse….

If he’s braving the Yorkshire weather then it must be a really big world threat this time. Something truly horrifying must be going down in Yorkshire. In a separate note I’m about to bake a cake.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 32 Comments

Investment Opportunity

Oh if they only sold chips in that size packets in the shops. That would be an opportunity I could not turn down…..

Everyone likes an investment opportunity with a great rate of return. I came across one yesterday, thanks to the helpful news reports. The news agencies are reporting that Lord Brownlow offered to pay £58k to cover the costs of the Prime Ministers controversial flat makeover. The thoughtful Lord can afford it as he has a net worth of over £250 million. In addition to his generous makeover offer he has also donated £3 million to the Governing Party and some of its MPs.

Now here’s the investment opportunity. Since 2017 the Government has awarded Lord Brownlow £120 Million in public contracts. So invest just over £3million and then receive £120 million. That’s a tidy investment return…

So maybe we can club together. Look for coins behind the sofa. Check those pockets. Raise a few million then give it to the UK Government or maybe donate it to the Prime Minister so he can buy a few more £850 per roll wallpaper. Then we start to rake in the money from the government contracts that come our way. We might even get to call ourself a Lord or Baroness……

That’s a plan…….

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 54 Comments

Nothing to see here

I was reading a news article about home schooling during the lockdown. A government politician was quoted as saying basically that all children needed to be in the classroom. No exceptions. Pupils discipline and grades had deteriorated during lockdown. Homeschooling could never work properly.

Ok so the last year must have a write off for Hawklad

Well let’s think about that…… Over the last year his grades have gone UP. So well that he was moved up sets. Look at his best subject. A year ago he could talk for days about British medieval history. He could name and describe every English monarch. He could talk well about Roman history. A year later he can still do that but now listen to him confidently talk American, European and Chinese history. Listen to him talk about recent world history, Classical Greek times…. you get the picture.

He’s expanded his knowledge on the animal kingdom.

He’s getting great marks now in English Literature. Macbeth, Animal Farm are well within his grasp.

A year ago we were fighting to get him support for his dyslexia. He needed assistance to read even the simplest text. A year at home and he hardly ever needs to ask for help with reading. He can do it himself. Yes he has to skip some words but now he can read articles on line. He can read books now. Slowly yes, but read definitely. 7 years of classroom teaching and he’s made the leap forward at HOME.

I’m no superman. No Yoda. No expert in teaching. Watch me look blankly in most subjects. I’m a bang average parent. Homeschooling has just suited Hawklad. He’s more relaxed. Can pace around. Can jump around subjects. Take breaks. Look at things he wants to. No pressure asking questions, no anxiety putting his have up in front of an overcrowded classroom. It just works for him.

Here’s the thing, the traditional classroom will suit some children. But not everyone. So why do THEY force all kids through the same hoops. Through the same moulds. Through the same exam routes. If the last 12 months has taught us anything it’s that we need to cater for all children. One path just isn’t enough.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 52 Comments

Vinyl Tours

Music has always been important to me. Even from a really young age I would love listening to my much older siblings playing their records. My first ever record was a single my sister bought me. It was a classic. Wait for it…..

Pinky and Perky singing Yellow Submarine and Those Magnificent Men in a Flying Machine. 😂😂😂😂😂

After that I slowly started building up a reasonable collection. Normally acquiring the occasional record from my siblings. I wasn’t picky, quite happy with their castoffs. By the time I was at college it was a hefty rock and metal collection. But then disaster. A house move left no available space, so some records were given away and the rest stored in my mums garden shed. A bad storm and flood destroyed much of the remaining records. A few survived.

Since then it’s been a slow rebuilding exercise. So let’s see what I can find in the metal cases now…. not taking any risks this time.

A newish record is first out of the case. Tin Machine. This one makes me smile. Back in 1991 I was going out with a girl from Newcastle and we had tickets to see the Moody Blues in a few weeks time. I was pottering around in the city one afternoon when I came across a queue outside a small concert hall/night club. Bizarrely many people in the queue had David Bowie shirts on. A polite enquiry revealed that Bowie’s current band was going to play this small venue on the same day as the Moody Blues concert. You didn’t get the chance to see Bowie everyday of the week and certainly not in a little venue like that. So I joined the queue and luckily got two tickets. We never did see the Moody Blues… Funny thing was the girl I was with was a massive Bowie fan so I kept the tickets secret. She only clicked on when we arrived at the Mayfair and I showed her the tickets. And yes Bowie was mesmerising.

The next record out of the case is an old one. It came from Hawklads Granny. She was having a clear out and wanted rid of her handful of records.

You know it’s a few years old when it comes with the following helpful label….

The thing about this box set is that it’s never been played. After all these decades. Never played. I think Hawklads granny bought it to get the music sheet booklet that came with it. She played the cello. Maybe it’s never going to be played.

And then the last one out of the case tonight is bizarrely the newest record in my collection. I’ve actually bought vinyl this year. Now virtually all of my records are rock and metal. A couple of classical records like the one above have been passed onto me. I’ve only ever bought rock or metal. Until now…..

Yes I have to come clean. I’ve bought a Taylor Swift record. That’s my metal head credentials blown out of the window. So can you keep a secret…..

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 37 Comments

Grey

It’s a grey morning definitely in need of a few smiles.

We have both just sniggered a bit. Trying to help Hawklad with his school at home day. It’s French. I’m not much help really. German yes I could help. Speaking gibberish certainly could help. French not really. It doesn’t help that French is one of the subjects that he isn’t getting much support with these days. So he often just has to look at the online class chat system. It’s sometimes used in class and can give at least an indication of what the lesson is supposed to be all about. Maybe even provide some of the questions the class are working on. Well that’s the theory…..

This morning no set work provided so all he can do is crack on with other subjects or find things to learn about and wait… Today he was researching the American Civil Rights movement while waiting for anything from French. Then a class comment was posted. 

ma belle-mère a bu trop de champagne et ma grand-mère est tombée du cgair.

“Oh my….Dad. Whats that supposed to be”

Wow is there anything else.

“No Dad just that. Any ideas apart from it’s about a Grand Mother and a Step Mum”

It surely can’t be what I think it means. Have a go at translating it with your dictionary

“Dad it means thanks to Google “My step mum has drunk too much booze and my grandmother has clearly been at it as well and fallen off the chair…. “

Yes I thought it kinda did mean that.

“Ok Dad as given my family world I am unlikely to need those French words, can I ignore it and get back to Martin Luther King.”

Yes you certainly can……

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 36 Comments

What

Always something to look at. Just need to take the time to find things to raise the spirits and lift the soul.

So far this week it’s been 8 lessons. 8 lessons of school at home. So what has been on the educational menu so far

Two lessons thankfully did deliver interest in the form of The Scottish Play and learning about some geographical features in Africa. But THEN…

An abstract artist he will probably never hear of again, some random French words relating to reality TV which he is unlikely ever to use again, drawing out a family tree, cutting an pasting some bible quotes onto the tree, learning about a computer app that he will probably never use again, looking at classroom comments in one class with no idea what was going on and three lessons with zero work provided.

The upshot of all this is too many lessons just missing the point with Hawklad. Just not connecting with him. Is he really learning enough. Is he really learning what he truly needs. Is he really enjoying learning.

That’s why you frequently catch him multitasking in many classes. Kind of following what’s happening in the class. Doing just enough. But then at the same time watching videos on things that do interest him. History, politics, geography, climate change, animal science.

Can’t blame him.