A short drive takes us into the heart of the Yorkshire MOORS. A stunningly moody setting for generations of fantastic storytellers. Wuthering Heights could only be set here in Yorkshire.

Today seemingly a perfect place for a trip out for Hawklad. He wanted to go out but to somewhere quiet and remote. The busiest time of the year for tourists yet we had the place to ourselves. Often it felt like we were the only two humans in these lands. That’s what Hawklad needed.

The setting perfect for forgetting the anxieties starting to build around the upcoming school return decision.

Then the decision was back centre stage for me. One small occurrence bringing the enormity of what Hawklad may soon be facing into clear focus.

A wall to be climbed. A set of steep, uneven narrow steps to be navigated. Helpfully a wooden handrail helped with my balance. But Hawklad couldn’t touch the handrail. Didn’t matter that I was probably the only person to touch the surface in hours. He just couldn’t touch it. Don’t laugh but he found a use for his old Dad. I stood next to the steps and he used the top of my head as a temporary balance aid. We laughed.

If he can’t touch surfaces how can he return to an overcrowded classroom with shared learning materials and equipment. He can’t touch door handles. He won’t even be able to touch his desk.

Two weeks to go and how can this school return happen.

Moody Moors. Moody Dad.

44 thoughts on “Moors

  1. You’re a wonderful dad and I’m sure that with your love, perseverance and determination, Hawklad will overcome all his difficulties, some day. I feel sad reading about your predicament and I hope something will be done soon, to help you resolve it


  2. Hawklad is a really good sensei, as are you. We can all learn important lessons here and shall we do a handful to let your evidence speak and recap in order of appearance in your blog post:
    1) What we think of as “A seemingly perfect place” can still have surprises and make us face fears and personal phobias e.g. This morning I suddenly saw a rat outside! 🐀
    2) Hawklad said “He wanted to go…” so there’s proof of willingness, being able to choose and say what things he can face, with a few terms and conditions of course “but quiet…”. Therefore isn’t it the way forward to write down negotiable provisos and provisions? Perhaps include backup plans? However, just like all good Action Plans, there’s a need for updating on a regular basis to show how things are progressing towards the goals or need more negotiations.
    3) Knowledge is power! So reading “anxieties starting to build” shows insight of the situation. We can see how half the battle has already been won in the awareness and acknowledgement.
    4) Look at that trust in “a temporary balance aid”. Hawklad show how he literally sees your head being safe and so do we from reading your blogs. We’re confident in your ability and a brilliant example of turning things around to a laugh. You can both take some credit.
    5) As “door handles” 🚪 ~ “desk” and other surfaces could be a trigger. Help is needed to provide plenty of individualized aids, safeguards and backup plans prior to any interactions. There’s a need to address as many of these things as possible, prior to any exposure.


      1. I have had a tendency to use long sleeves in the past, to pull a door and still use my elbow to push doors open out of habit. Hankies in various pocket might help Hawklad. I use the right one for clean ones and the left used. I wear cargo trousers for the pockets at work and have a clean pocket for new disposable gloves, as I often find there’s not ones in my size left available and I can’t be asked to go fetch a box all the time, for each separate room.


  3. Hey, you two walked the steps together. That is a powerful moment! As for Hawklad, I know he’s not a fan of socks, but would gloves help? That little bit of separation may make him more comfortable to touch things. Plus then he can throw the gloves away at the end of the day with all germs.
    I do hope that whichever path you two choose, it’s the one you both are content to take. Hugs and prayers for you both! xxxxxxxx


    1. We have thought about gloves but he faces 3 problems. One he hates the feel. Then he can’t touch them so can’t take them off, so he might struggle to use the computer touchscreens. Then it’s what happens if another kid makes a comment. But it might be the only option. Xxxxxx

      Liked by 1 person

      1. There’s various types of disposable ones, with variation in quality and feel. At work there’s see through ones and all sorts of blue. Some pale blue ones came in looking like they’d been cooked stiff, the soft darker blue were better. Some of the gloves inside the boxes have been crap. Only on Friday, again there was a glove with a bit missing, this time the thumb. Anyways, I preferred the soft purple ones, but they all make my hands sweat and so I tend to go for a size larger than my hands to be able to get each new pair on after washing my hands. I also use tea tree face wipes on my hands. These come in green packs:


  4. Because pictures. I’m transported to the pages of Wuthering Heights. Heaviness continues to linger. We just have to let each day unfold and evolve and look for faint rays of hope. 🌟💛


  5. That’s the trouble with intelligence – most people wouldn’t consider the outside of the glove. In this situation I would contact the school/education dept and make it their problem. You have enough to do.


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