There is a new rule in England. If there is an independent body then our Prime Minister will appoint his friends to make those bodies definitely not independent. It started with BBC News. Then the media watchdogs and it’s just getting silly now. There is an independent body that advises on ethics in public life. Guess what. He has appointed an old university friend, who with Johnson was part of a notorious drinking and partying private club. That’s modern England for you.

So clearly it’s ok to appoint whoever you like to anything these days. So why don’t we all do that. What fun we can have. How easy life will be.

So here are a few of my appointments.

I would like to appoint myself as James Bond.

I would also like to appoint myself as the new Thor.

I would also like to appoint myself as the next winner of the Great British Bake Off.

I would like to appoint our family dog, Captain Chaos as my Countries Prime Minister. Far more qualified than the current numpty and our dog doesn’t lie. The Cap is also not a racist, sexist or homophobic.

I would like to appoint our family cat and gerbils as his Government.

On discussion with my son I would like to appoint Hawklad as the new Darth Vader, Head of Disney and lead guitarist of Iron Maiden.

Further appointments to follow.


Bad weather on the way. Around here it’s called moky yukken it dooon. I probably could explain to you how that is pronounced but that would give away the Yorkshire Entry Test we have at our borders 😂😂😂😂 Helps keep out the numpties…..

A quick scan at todays news headlines tells me everything I need to know about the country I live in these days. Just why Yorkshire really needs these anti numpty controls. In a nutshell the following news words sum up modern Britain.


Boris sends Gunboats to Jersey to protect our fish from the French….. (that’s an unaltered headline, I kid you not)

Boris Johnson helps billionaire Friend James Dyson to pay millions less in tax….. in an unrelated story Boris Johnson’s brother has been made a Director of James Dyson’s company.

Government announce that Covid strategy is on track and the threat from mutations has been overstated, testing data confirm that that ….In unrelated news the Government confirmed that they have not yet started surge testing for the really worrying Indian mutation as it is not seen as a current threat. Even without this enhanced testing, over 800 cases have been confirmed over the last couple of weeks.

Traditionally Labour voting Hartlepool is likely to vote for Boris in today’s By-election. Apparently the town sees itself aligned with Boris Johnson’s vision for Britain – in unrelated news, after Brexit and 10 years of Conservative governing Hartlepool has the highest unemployment rate in the country. It’s fishing industry has collapsed since Brexit. It needs 9 food banks (it needed zero 10 years ago) and just under 30% of children in the town are officially listed as living in poverty.

A recent poll finds that the majority of voters are blaming immigration for the countries woes – there are no words…..

The Government has confirmed a new royal yacht will be built at a cost of £200M. The Government has also confirmed that it is looking to spend £35 Billion on new missiles for its nuclear submarine fleet. – in unrelated news the Government has been unable to find resources to fund a proper pay increase for its NHS heroes or increase child poverty payments to families most in need.

The Government has confirmed that the budget for overseas clean water and sanitation projects will be slashed by 80% as part of non-essential service cutbacks – there are no words…….


Today I am officially done with my country……

Investment Opportunity

Oh if they only sold chips in that size packets in the shops. That would be an opportunity I could not turn down…..

Everyone likes an investment opportunity with a great rate of return. I came across one yesterday, thanks to the helpful news reports. The news agencies are reporting that Lord Brownlow offered to pay £58k to cover the costs of the Prime Ministers controversial flat makeover. The thoughtful Lord can afford it as he has a net worth of over £250 million. In addition to his generous makeover offer he has also donated £3 million to the Governing Party and some of its MPs.

Now here’s the investment opportunity. Since 2017 the Government has awarded Lord Brownlow £120 Million in public contracts. So invest just over £3million and then receive £120 million. That’s a tidy investment return…

So maybe we can club together. Look for coins behind the sofa. Check those pockets. Raise a few million then give it to the UK Government or maybe donate it to the Prime Minister so he can buy a few more £850 per roll wallpaper. Then we start to rake in the money from the government contracts that come our way. We might even get to call ourself a Lord or Baroness……

That’s a plan…….

Sun setting

Last of the sun. The sun setting. Setting on a dangerously messed up country.

Thought for the day.

A member of the UK Government resigned yesterday over broken promises. His description of the Government is enlightening bearing in mind that these things are usually framed in very polite and respectful language. Respectfully he described Boris Johnson’s Government as a “Cesspit” and “the most distrustful and awful environment” he had ever worked in.

My mind goes back to the brilliant tweet one brave official released from the official UK Government Civil Service account.

“Arrogant and offensive. Can you imagine having to work for these truth twisters…..

Remember back when BBC News was a respected, independent agency. A highly respected BBC journalist (Eddie Mair) interviewed Johnson before he became our leader. An interview that the BBC has buried. It ended with the respected journalist concluding

Making up quotes., lying to your party leader, wanting to be part of someone being physically assualted – you’re a nasty piece of work, aren’t you

And people still will vote for them….

Staggering and frightening.



So the member of the Government in charge of the NHS, Matt Hancock owns 15% of the shares in a company just awarded supplier status to the NHS. Apparently he doesn’t take an active role in the companies affairs. Apparently he leaves that to his sister who owns more shares and is a Director of the company.

Apparently that is perfectly above board.


But surely it’s no worse that our NHS awarding a contract to the former neighbour and personal friend of Hancock. A neighbour awarded a £30M contract to supply Protective Face Masks even though his friends company had no Medical experience and produced plastic cups. Apparently that was ok as Hancock denied being friends with his friend and never socialised with him and most definitely never drunk with him. In an unrelated matter, thanks to the Guardian Newspaper he is a photo of Hancock not at all socialising with a man who is definitely not his friend and most definitely not drinking. Maybe they are having a chance meeting and are celebrating a £30M contract award….


If I had done that when I worked for the NHS I would have been sacked and ended up in court for Procurement Fraud.


Fan mail.

It’s been a while but I seem to have upset someone again. A couple of comments from my own country. So to my new fan I am certainly not thankful for everything Boris is doing for us. I hear you, I think.

Our schools are open again. Brexit is the best thing we have ever done, We are free of Europe. We control our borders again. We are safer. We have beaten Covid. Apparently I’m a ‘trumped up lefty’, ‘a European lover’ and ‘I need to get my head out of my ****”. IF I don’t like it then ‘I should sod off to France’.

Sadly if you hadn’t of sworn I might not have accidentally blocked you.

Ok I’m probably a bit left of centre. Definitely think of myself as European. And I probably would sod off to Europe if I could. Unfortunately your beloved Brexit has just made that virtually impossible. So I’m actually kind of with you so far. But sorry I don’t share your view on anything else. Thanks to Boris we have the most corrupt Government we’ve had in centuries. We have some of the highest Covid death rates in the world. Our care homes were forsaken by his government in their our of need. Thousands died. We’ve had spikes in death rates directly correlated to decisions from Boris. Brexit is a shambles and killing off large parts of the economy. Our countries civil rights are being undermined because of Boris. He’s turned his back on the Grenfall Tower survivors. He’s refused to take action on all the other dangerous High Rise buildings. He’s repeatedly turned his back on the family’s in this country who are in food poverty. He’s slashed the overseas aid budget.

So no I don’t think we will ever agree. We shall continue to dream for really different countries. I’m never going to sign up to yours. That’s never going to happen.


Are there any countries out there who would like a new citizen. I don’t take up much space, I’m happy to learn the language, sing the new national anthem and I’m house trained.

I’m sat here quite prepared to renounce my British citizenship. Clearly I don’t fit anymore. I don’t seem to fit in with the expected thinking.

Approval for the Government is at an all time high. On the back of a vaccination programme which was one of the few things they decided to leave entirely up to the public sector experts to sort out and deliver. Just don’t mention the fiasco of the privatised Track and Trace system which has now custom £37B. A country where many people turn a blind eye to the daily top level corruption which the Government don’t even bother hiding now. Where you are expected to ignore the court rulings that have found the Government is acting illegally. Shrug off the criminal negligence that has been our response to the pandemic costing thousands and thousands their life’s. Smiling at the empty food shelves and rising costs from the Brexit car crash. Preferring to moan about a bit of royal fall out rather than focus on the Government spending over £300k of tax payers money to pay off a bullying allegation against the Home Secretary. Seemingly ok with giving the wonderful NHS staff a miserly 1% pay increase while it hands out billions in dodgy contracts to party backers and personal friends. Believing that we are all in this together while the PM seeks rich charity funds to pay for a £200000 makeover of his flat.

As I’m not OK with this maybe it is time for me to pack my bags. The question is where do I go. Before Brexit I had the option of moving to any country in the EU. But now that right has been removed as clearly a loss of personal freedoms is seen as progress….

So where are the countries that I should move to. The ones that still have a moral compass. The ones you can be proud of. Sadly that is not Britain.

Busted News Busted BBC News

On Friday the UK Government and the Minister in charge of Health (Hancock) were found guilty of acting UNLAWFULLY. The real whiff of corruption. A few years back that would have been news. BIG NEWS. Politicians with principles would have resigned.

Not anymore.

It’s definitely move on, nothing to concern you here.

A check on the main BBC News website not 24 hours after the court judgement and absolutely nothing. Not one reference. Lots of news about Hancock. Lots of quotes from him about other issues but not a single reference to the giant elephant in the room. Even on the 10 must read news items the BBC thinks you need to read – nothing. Government publicity photo shoots, Kim Kardashian, Royal News and a bear attack in Alaska are more deserving of our attention. What has happened to a valued news organisation that was independent and respected.

Our news is BUSTED.