There comes a time when bread has to be baked. No gluten, no yeast, no dairy bread. Whisper it but it went without disaster. No need for nuclear decontamination. I didn’t creat Frankenstein’s monster. It kinda looks like bread. It kinda tasted like bread. It actually tasted ok.
Maybe I’m getting there.
Maybe I might be a approaching something like parenting competency.
Maybe next I might even figure out how the steam iron works 😂😂😂😂
M
It was only a matter of time. Somethings are set in stone. They just must happen.
So the Olympics is on. It just needs a major international sporting event to take place and the inevitable happens. Anyone with Yorkshire DNA immediately can only utter the following words for at least to weeks…
“See what would happen if Yorkshire was a country. We would show them….”
So here is the current Olympic Medals Table !!!!! The ‘reet properrr’ one.
You know what boys are like. Any excuse to get dirty. Spraying food and drink everywhere. None stop partying. Any excuse for a game of football.
Well there comes a time when even a boy needs a bath, even worse a hair wash.
Well this one just did and he looks like a rather grand drowned rat….. And nothing better than drinking from your own bath. Boys will be boys.
Then there is only one way to get dry….
There is nothing like a good breakfast to kick start the day. Especially when it’s been another largely sleepless night. Today it was going to be cornflakes and flaxseed with a thick topping of fruit. No fresh fruit was available this week from the store so I opted for tinned fruit. Tropical Fruit Salad in juice. That will do nicely.
The reality was somewhat different.
As I poured the fruit over my cereal my brain tried to reboot from its reduced power standby mode. This doesn’t look right. Then the penny finally dropped just after tin was emptied. . Why was I tipping tinned baby carrots over my cornflakes.
Waste not want not. Wow that’s a taste sensation. 🥺🥺🥺🥺
Since I’ve been a parent watching my son go through the school system I have heard many things. Many things from those in charge of our school system. I’ve heard things like
The school day is too short
The children get too many holidays
We need to test and test again from as early as 5 years old
Schools fail not because of the system but because of poor classroom discipline
We need to bring back Victorian school values
Time off for bereavement is just an extended holiday for kids
Learning has to be about the needs of the economy
Teaching materials need to be carefully controlled so that pupils learn the right things
Smaller class sizes are overrated
Pupils taking a stand on climate change is really just an excuse to miss lessons
The school lunch break is too long
Pupils get too many breaks during the school day
Not enough children are taking part in after school learning activities
Not enough homework is issued
Ok you get the picture. Now ok I understand some parents will agree with those above statements but not me. I wouldn’t let this bunch of charlatans pretending to be a Government run a bath never mind our children’s schools.
But here’s the key thing. I’m hearing discipline, testing, work pupils harder…. One word I don’t hear is
FUN
What happened to childhood being the happiest time of our life’s.
Another word I don’t hear is
PLAY
What happened to childhood being about dreaming and playing.
Another word I don’t hear is
IMAGINATION
What happened to childhood being about dreaming and learning to think big.
Maybe that’s why we have such a huge mental health crisis amongst our young. Too much pressure. The world is changing rapidly so to me the last thing we need as a society is forcing our children through a factory school based system. Factory Education Farming based on values from over 100 years ago. It’s time to free up our schools. Let’s make schooling FUN again.
The school gates close for just under seven weeks and Hawklad wanted a celebratory car ride. To mark his freedom from school work, exams and having to get up before midday (😂😂) he came up with his own music playlist for the car ride.
So here’s Hawklads End of School playlist.
He had to sneak one song in just to wind up his old Dad….. But I will settle for 15 out of 16 good ones. So in the words of the Mr Alice Cooper
School’s out for Summer!!!
You get these days……
Hawklad was taking his science revision really seriously. We were in the garden playing football. Actually I was trying to show off. Trying to show Hawklad that I could curl a free kick around the sundial and nestle the ball into the top corner. All with my left peg.
Sadly I am no Messi.
The ball screamed into the farmers field. Like an Exocet missile it landed perfectly into a new and very deep cowpat. I jumped over the fence again landing perfectly into an even bigger cow gift. I wasn’t picking that ball up so I decided kick it. Have you ever kicked a cowpat. It explodes…… I was covered. It even went up my nose. Up my pigging nose. That’s emasculating.
The smell taking me back to days living near a sewage treatment facility. All very Nose-talgic……
Definitely one of those days….
Some pets will stand a respectful distance away while you exercise. The yoga instructor I follow has a dog that sits perfectly still and just behaves. No interference.
Then there are other pets.
Pets that like to get involved.
Close to the action.
Take over….
Guess who has been baking again. Yes NORAD have raised the threat level to DEFCON THREE.
Years ago I worked in a Police Force as a civilian. I was based at an old country mansion which acted at the Police Headquarters. At the front desk there was a sign on the wall saying THREAT LEVEL. It had a slide in colour board. Usually it was Green (it’s all cool dude), sometimes yellow (it’s not so cool but no need to panic dude) and rarely Red (it’s time to assume the crash position dude). We also had white which meant ‘everything was cool, but the government audit team is in so put on a tie, dude’. One day the threat level went brown. No one had a clue what that meant. Even granite chiselled veterans had never seen that colour in decades of work here. Much confusion and speculation ensued. The receptionist was not there so we couldn’t ask her. She was like Thor’s Heimdall. The Gatekeeper. No one got in or out without her approval during the day. She also maintained the threat level board.
Finally she was located. Apparently Threat Level BROWN was ‘she had put the board in back to front’. If just one of us muppets had bothered to look on the other side of the board we would have found that it was in fact GREEN…..
And yes DEFCON THREE was wrong. Apart from the earthquake cracked crust it was a rather fine gluten and dairy free loaf. Time to lower the threat level.
Kids don’t try this…..
Lack of sleep does strange things to the mind and body. It took me 30 minutes into a yoga session before that the odd sensation I was experiencing was attributed to me putting on my compression shorts back to front. If only it stopped there.
I decided I needed a milky and sweet coffee to get me going. The sugar is next to the kettle. So what sleep induced madness sent me to the cupboard. Made me reach out and grab a large bag. Open that bag. Carefully add two spoonfuls of the white powder into my drink. Then stir and stir. Rather puzzled at the enfolding congealed mess. Then taste what was clearly something approaching wallpaper paste.
Only a lack of sleep ends with self raising flour being added to coffee.
Well at least it cut down on the calories…..
A Dad trying to cope with the loss of his Partner and becoming a single parent. 