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Terminator

Kinda feels like the type of sky you get just before it all goes horribly wrong in a Terminator movie. This time no coming storm. Just me in the kitchen making a curry. Actually very similar when you think about it. Especially if you have ever seen or unfortunately tasted one of my Saag Aloo horrors.

As I watched that cloud formation role through my thoughts had moved from terrible cooking to more important stuff. Doesn’t that cloud look like a polar bear lying flat out on its tummy. Well it did to me….

We spent an hour or so playing the cloud spotting game today. Fantastic free garden entertainment, the kinda stuff you need during a prolonged lockdown. While we were cloud spotting I kept hearing a nagging voice in my head. We could be so easily playing this in a years time. It’s not unreasonable to assume that Hawklads anxieties and phobias will still be here in a years time. If so then our lockdown will still be in place in March 2022. That would make it TWO years. TWO years. Maybe that is what the clouds are telling me. There is a storm coming. A long protracted one.

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Schools Out

Schools Out, Schools Out for Easter.

The last day of term was marked with another school letter. Another positive pupil case with 45 other pupils in isolation for 10 days. Across the country infection rates amongst the 5 to 14 age group are rising since schools returned. On Monday some of the country’s lockdown rules are eased.

Well at least everyone is still wearing masks…..

On the way back from the vaccination centre yesterday I stopped off for petrol. Straw pole. Me and the person behind the till had masks fully on. One lady appeared to have a mask but she was carrying it in her hand. Another guy had a mask hanging loosely around his neck. Everyone else, no mask.

Lockdowns Out, Lockdowns Out for Easter

So the two week break has started. Started with sitting out in the baking sun. Talking with Hawklad on what he would like to do over the next few days. First ice creams of the break. Sat outside in the freezing wind.

Wooly Jumpers Out, Wooly Jumpers Out for Easter.

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Somersault

Almost a summer sky and most definitely a winter wind – it’s freezing. Definitely a two jumper day…. But still nice. Would have loved to be outside more but pesky school got in the way of that plan.

After two hours of trying to figure out how to insert graphs into an online test document…

“Dad I thought you had a degree in computing.”

Well kind of.

“Well it’s not much use here. Admit it you spent those university years in the bar…”

And on the sports pitches. Don’t forget in bed as well.

“Well that’s not helping with this is it Dad. Might as well ask the toilet seat for help.”

To be fair I focused on Artificial Intelligence and Expert Systems, not stupid school packages. What you sniggering at Son….

“You. Muppet Dad. Are you sure it wasn’t Artificial Incompetence. Useless. Looks like you’ve just crashed the system now.”

Yes definitely crashed. Think it didn’t like me pressing all the keys at the same time in a slightly angry manner.

“How on earth did they let you into a university.”

I think they were desperate. I was late for the entrance interview as well. I got lost and ended up at the wrong university, in the wrong city. When I did arrive i was 3 hours late only to find out that I had the wrong day as well. I had come a day early.

“No wonder as a toddler I would talk with mum and just bash you over the head with anything I could find.”

I’ve still got the bruises.

“No Dad those are from last week where you tried to show me that you could still do a somersault on the trampoline. “

I almost did it. Just my bum got in the way.

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Report

The end of term report landed today. Whatever happened to the old paper report books I got as a child. Now it’s downloadable content. Handwritten teacher narrative replaced by numbers and symbol targets. My report was easy to follow. Just look out for the telling teaching phrases

“Must try harder”

“Falls asleep in class”

“Daydreamer”

“Always looking out of the window”

“Distinctly average”

“Oh dear, where do I start”

Hawklad’s report is much harder to fathom out. After several hours of review I’m still not entirely sure what it’s telling me. Maybe it’s telling me to dig out the chocolate and watch Ice Age.

At least the arrival of the Term Reports does reveal one fact. A pleasant fact. In just a couple of days the Term will end and it’s a couple of weeks off. Hawklad gets a break. I get a break. A break from school at home.

That’s a report finding I can fully get behind.

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Homework

Let’s be honest I’m not the biggest fan of school homework. Not a fan all those years ago when I suffered it as a child and certainly not now as a parent. Occasionally the homework I’ve encountered has had some learning merits. On a few rarer occasions it’s been interesting even wait for it – FUN. Sadly in the vast majority of cases it’s unremittingly dull, of little value to the child and no better than parrot learning dross. A desperate attempt to tick off parts of the government curriculum. I’ve lost count of the times Hawklad has put so much effort into a piece of homework and then gets zero feedback. Too often it’s probably not even marked.

What is the point….

Hawklad has a number of such seemingly meaningless pieces of homework to complete this week. Let’s just look at one of those. How about Religious Education. To paraphrase

Look at your last classroom assessment. Examine your answers and look at the comments. Make corrections to your answers in green pen (must be in green) so that all the teacher comments have been clearly considered. Now fully re-answer two of the assessment questions in your book ensuring all teacher comments are addressed. Homework must be submitted before the start of the next lesson.

That’s RE…. I might be missing something but is that really how you teach this subject. How you teach any subject. How is that approach doing anything positive. Talk about draining the FUN and ENJOYMENT out of school. And guess what.

“Dad can I drop this subject….”.

Homework – don’t you just love it…. Well the Government does as it fits in with their schooling vision….How depressing is that.

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Advertising

Technology is definitely trying to take over. On the last post I did about ‘Sunday’s’ my autocorrect was clearly not impressed with the overall message. That would explain its desire to change every SUNDAY to SUBWAY. That would give that post a very different feel. But hang on… Is it on to something.

Maybe I’m missing out on a real money spinner. Product placement. Hidden advertisements. How much would SUBWAY pay for some subliminal advertising. Maybe it’s not too late to dream of that apartment overlooking Lake Lucerne.

WORDPRESS is really playing up. Randomly refusing to accept any editing and posting the first, rough cut of posts. Refusing to let me comment or like on some sites. Messing up the formatting. Deleting comments and removing some of my posts. Unfollowing without telling me. So frustrating that is MARS my day. What a great idea, I fancy a really healthy and tasty chocolate bar.

We soldier on with WORDPRESS. So the school at home week starts again. The last one before the Easter holiday. No actual holidays this break again. No trips to the hills and FjORDs. No need to hire a fine FORD car. At least I won’t need to worry about cutting my hair. No SAMSON nITEmares at the barbers required. But if I was going on holiday I can’t think of a finer brand of luggage to take with me than SAMSONITE.

The NEXT benefit of no holidays is I don’t need to do any holiday clothes shopping. Shopping to the wonderful and certainly not overpriced NEXT clothes stores…

But a couple of weeks will hopefully allow me to catch up on some MARVELlous DISNEY offerings. Enjoy the wonderful story telling and the hidden alLEGOries. More time to play with our LEGO sets and never stand barefooted on those really value for money LEGO mini figures.

Anyway that’s enough of me waffling on. I will get back to my grAPPLEs with WORDPRESS. But I can’t think of a finer technological platform to fight those battles on than APPLE. Thinking often requires a large amount HEINZ -sight.

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Motivation

A number of comments over the last few months have brought up one word. Motivation. Motivation for the parents to keep grinding through the homeschool days. Motivation of the teachers to keep entering cramped and unhealthy classrooms to keep trying to educate. What are the real motivations of the Government. AND most importantly the motivation required for pupils to keep trying to learn when the odds are stacked against them.

“Dad, REALLY, what is the point…”

What’s wrong Hawklad.

“Nothing from best lesson of the day. Not a thing yet the next lesson manages to flood me with stuff after stuff on what the various religions say on same sex marriages.”

“Don’t get me wrong it’s an important thing. But not in this much detail. Frankly I’m bored now. Very bored.”

“They tell me in great detail what others think but haven’t bothered to ask my opinion.”

Well Son it’s the last lesson of this for a week.

“Well it will be back next week talking about the same things again. Not sure it’s possible to be anymore bored than I am right now.”

“What is the point…. well now they have given homework out on this. Tough – I will just take the punishment. I’m not doing it.”

Well find something else to learn about.

“I have. I watched a video on Maggie Thatcher and how she was booted out of office.”

Good for you.

“It’s not something that will be on the exams as school don’t cover it. But stuff it. Its better than the stuff we are being told what to learn about today. What is the point.”

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Mixed

Another one of those school at home days for Hawklad. Two lessons fully made available and with in lesson email support. Can’t fault that support at all. Then two lessons with absolutely nothing. No support. No classroom material. No idea what the class did.

Yesterday was a similar picture. One complete lesson with full classroom support. One lesson with some documents shared but no support. Then two ghost lessons. Absolutely nothing. Complete radio silence.

That creates kind of a problem. In some subjects Hawklad is keeping up with the class. But in other subjects repeated missing or incomplete lessons will eventually take its toll. He will fall behind. With no prospect of him returning any time soon the issues with certain subjects will grow. A time will come when he can’t make up the gap.

It’s a real concern. I’ve spoken to school, but these are such challenging times for schools. I guess it’s just making the best of it for the moment. Hanging in there until Hawklad is able to return or he opts out of school teaching permanently.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 44 Comments

Problematic

A brief few moments of blue sky before the Yorkshire mist and drizzle rolled back in. It was nice will it lasted.

I received an email from school today informing parents that a pupil had tested positive for Covid. The pupil has been sent home and a further 20 pupils have been asked to self isolate. The concern is that the pupil had no symptoms and it can’t be established how long they had been infectious for. It is entirely possible that the in-school test last week provided an inaccurate all clear result.

Can’t say I’m entirely disappointed that Hawklad is currently at home.

But it’s sometimes not the easiest of options.

Did we have a hockey stick. Did we have a hockey ball. Kind of made hockey practice a little problematic….

Did we have any graph paper. Had the printer run out of ink. Kind of made detailed and accurate graph work a little problematic…..

Could we find a working green pen. Kind of made self marking work (if it’s not done in green then it’s additional marks deducted) a little problematic…..

Could we find the video showing the science experiment. Kind of made writing about the results a little problematic…..

Trying to keep a full, overcrowded school open based on solely on unreliable Covid self tests is a little problematic…..

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Abstract

Let’s be honest, it’s not really sunbathing weather here in Yorkshire. It’s ‘let’s see how many layers of clothes I can squeeze under the down jacket before it bursts at the seems’ weather.

“Go on then Dad, can you see it”

What is that supposed to be again.

“It’s an abstract artist’s interpretation of what our market town looks like.”

No that’s not really jumping into my brain that interpretation.

“What do you see then Dad.”

A series of random line squiggles and odd shapes. Forming what can only be described as a incoherent mess.

“Exactly Dad. Apparently that’s the town skyline and its most iconic landmarks.”

Really. If it’s most iconic landmarks then I’m certainly not seeing traffic jams, floods, not open at weekend signs, pizza takeouts and hordes of parking enforcement officers.

“Dad, Aspergers clearly doesn’t get abstract art…”

It’s ok Hawklad, Dads don’t get it as well.

“I’ve got to produce my own version of that now. Really…”

Shall we just put a pot of ink and a piece of paper in with the gerbils and let them get creative.

“Would be a good idea but the gerbils eat everything in front of them”

“Well you can help me do it.”

Ok do you want me to draw as well.

“No I‘ve seen your artistic skills. Look at the state of my hair. No you can do something your better at.”

Ok you name it.

“Go and find some chocolate for me please”

I can do that…