It’s that autumnal time of year for cobwebs. The local world is covered in them. Definitely another great reason to go outside. That one is almost good enough to play tennis with.

If only the cobwebs didn’t extend to my brain…..

Trying to show Hawklad how you work this little beauty out.

If 9 grams of water is decomposed, how many grams of oxygen and hydrogen are obtained?

If only it was just this one question. Another 30 questions of increasingly fiendish difficulty are facing Hawklad. As his science expert (🥸🥸🥸🤪🤪🤪) it was my job to explain that to him. Oh the brain cobwebs. That part of my brain has been much neglected over the many years since leaving university. Strangely no cobwebs in the parts of the brain that could answer questions like

Who won the FACUP in 1955?

Who played the hero scientist in Quatermass and the Pit?

Name all the characters in The Penguins of Madagascar?

Recite every word from The Dead Parrot sketch?

But sadly chemistry has much cobwebbing for some peculiar reason. So after 90 minutes of mental short circuiting I asked the next question with some trepidation.

What’s the next lesson?

Its History Dad. All about the 1542 Witchcraft Act.

Oooohhhhh. #@##%##@…..

It’s ok Dad, we have unbelievably done that before. I’m good on that. You can stand down for 90 minutes and have a rest.

The 1542 Witchcraft Act is clearly a horrible moment in our history but I get a rest, so for one day only, it’s gone up in my estimation. Does that make me a bad parent…….

53 thoughts on “Cobwebs

  1. You know what though, it was only yesterday I recited a shortened version of some Terry Pratchet to a young man, as he apologised for the sound of his clip clop shoes as he followed behind me in the street. I said “Don’t worry, a witch is never scared of the dark wood, for she’s the most frightening thing in it”.
    Of course the actual quote is: “A witch ought never to be frightened in the darkest forest, Granny Weatherwax had once told her, because she should be sure in her soul that the most terrifying thing in the forest was her.”
    You know I only learnt t’other day, that the pointed black hat was simply worn by women who brewed beer 🍺 🍺 🍺 and sold it. Actually, this is a good “point” of history and I think Hawklad might like you to chip in on this one with regard equality/inequality of all genders over history:

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I get the feeling that I might have missed out on something special, as I’ve not actually read any of them (late developer me, learning the details of book reading in my mid 20s). Little snippets from here and there of great things have stuck in my mind, mainly from hearing and taking it in. Mother wasn’t “Normal” and would recite stuff like:


  2. I’ll try this one, but you didn’ t hear this from me. Because the oxygen and hydrogen atoms being released from the container holding the 9 grams of water during decomposition are vibrating at a much higher level than the water atoms,, they expand to fill whatever container they are decomposing into. This vibration causes the gas to seem virtually weightless. So, while technically 9 grams of water should be expected to become 9 grams of gas, this can never happen. For one thing, there will always be impurities left behind from the water being decomposed. So, if you weigh the residue left behind after the water decomposes, you may then be able to determine how much gaseous material escaped into the air. That from an old non-scientific or mathematical mind working completely from expected logic.
    Meanwhile, have you ever seen a cob building a cobweb? Me neither!


  3. I get already dizzy from only reading the question. I have never been good at anything that includes mathematics. You definitely are a good parent that you are making such an effort to understand in order to explain it to you your son… but you are only human.


  4. 1542 Witchcraft Act – blimey that sounds seriously exciting stuff! 🙂

    I was Googling that beauty myself … as to the first question … next!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. My answer to the 9 grams of water question is 9 grams (of oxygen and hydrogen). As to the mass of each, I claim more cobwebs than you. Besides, does it really matter? Recombine them and you’ll have 9 grams of water again.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s