Damp, dark, chilly and windy. Definitely Autumn in Yorkshire. it also means places like The Yorkshire Arboretum will be unusually quiet. That’s the perfect time for Hawklad to have a relaxing visit. It’s good when he feels like he just about has a place to himself. That makes such a difference to him.
And it did.
And it made all the difference to his old Dad as well.
Can’t beat the quiet, can’t beat nature, can’t beat the autumnal colours.
Sun setting on another day. Looking at the forecast I think the sun is going on holiday for a few days and that holiday won’t be taken in Yorkshire.
It’s now a week off from school and the school at home project. Much needed. The last 7 weeks have been a grind. Lots of hard work and pushing, feeling like it’s lots of effort just to stand still. This week off needs to be about recharging the batteries. Letting Hawklad be himself, try to make it as fun as possible for him. Maybe even catch up with a little bit of Dad sleep. That alarm clock is definitely being switched off for a few days.
So I looked out across the hillside and across the Vale. Looking West towards the setting Sun which was briefly illuminating a strong, resilient tree. We can do this. So many wonderful moments can still be played out. Dreams are out there. Dreams can happen. It can be a wonderful life. It really can be.
The local cows seeking shelter from the blistering Yorkshire Autumnal Sun. Wow it’s been cold. Definitely two jumper weather.
Today we have had plenty of time to be out in the cold. Four lessons today and virtually no work sent from school. One random map but no information, no explanation, no questions, just a map. That was it. Hawklad spent the day doing his own thing. Nothing else for him to do.
Eventually I called it. Enough for one day. Turn the school iPad off and let’s go and get some ice cream. I’m actually half tempted to tell him not to switch the iPad on tomorrow as well. Currently what is the point to this school at home project.
So ice cream it was. As I was walking back with the goodies. Then definite proof that Yorkshire Birds are a breed apart.
How long do I have to sit on this big egg before it hatches.
Without doubt the academic high of the day.
Beautiful walk but why did I do it in shorts. Those thistles are painful on the shins.
I’m trying to work out what’s more painful
The Dentist…
OR
School…
Unusually this time it’s not physical pain with the Dentist. Just pain on the wallet. How much for no work. Here is another thing. When the Hygienist is talking like at a million miles an hour about life, the universe, homeschooling. How did she remember that I’m a single dad with Hawklad at home. When she is firing questions at me about how I’m doing…what’s school doing….. will he go back….have you seen the Bond movie….
What is the protocol for responding. Do I just nod. Do I do someform of eyelash/eyebrow morse code. Do I try to talk as she is prodding around my teeth. Do I wait and save the answers up until she has finished.
It’s all beyond me.
The pain of school……
Hawklad asked a teacher a civil question about some lesson work. The teacher’s response was much less civil. Actually very sarcastic. Basically saying ‘what’s the point answering that if you can’t be bothered to send in any homework’. Hawklad stood his ground and said that he had submitted all the work to date. Teacher came back with ‘wrong, I’ve not seen anything from you all year’. Angry Dad got involved providing screen copies of all the work submitted, in the right location. Sarcastic Dad sensing blood added a screen copy of one piece of homework which showed clearly that the very same teacher had actually marked that piece of work. The words ‘Full Marks’ with the teachers signature next to it. Eventually a sheepish teacher replied ‘I might have been a little quick with those email’s’. Righteous Dad pointed out that the teacher hadn’t bothered to mark any of the other work Hawklad had submitted……
If only it was just one subject and just one teacher that I have had a run in with this week…. Much groaning which actually was probably the sound I made trying to respond to the hygienist while she was scraping around my teeth
Yes definitely today – The pain of school is far worse…….
This week has been frustrating. So frustrating.
It’s been as tough a week that I can remember on this school at home project. Links with a number of teachers have become very strained. I bet the teachers are as desperate for the upcoming week break as we are.
Work has been a struggle. What can you do when so many are off with Covid. Not enough people still standing to cover the jobs. As much as I move the pieces around I’m always going to be short. Oh yes, sorry, apparently the pandemic is over….
My diet is a struggle. It’s a gluten and dairy free life for me at present. Yet those items are strangely unavailable at our local stores. Clearly the gluten free wagons are stuck somewhere trying to get into this brexit wonderland. I guess it’s a week of mostly jacket potatoes. I know what Matt Damon feels like in The Martian now….
Wow I need a break. But that break seems further away than ever. If only I could be Boris Johnson. Tell everyone we are in this together, take £20 a week off the poorest in our country then jump on a jet for a weeks painting and drinking at a Billionaires pad in the sun.
Dreams of a much better life are there. Stronger than ever. Just not this week. Not any time soon. Need to be patient.
Sleep. I find it’s a commodity vastly overrated but actually much needed….
And yet…..
If I just look up it’s amazing what I can find even on a 1 minute walk to the postbox.
There is always something to hold on to. There is always hope. When I focus on what really matters to me. The amazing in my life. I realise actually it’s still a wonderful life. Yes I’m ready to go again…..
Traffic meltdown in Yorkshire the other day. Hawklad, Captain Chaos and Muppet Dad had to walk past a toad on the road. Proper Traffic Jam during the morning rush hour. It’s a tough modern life here……
Do you think I miss city life…..
Would I miss school at home parenting…….
Another mad day…….
An email from school informing parents that they will need to fork out for a new school iPad which will be used during teaching. Three years ago we forked out for the last one.
More school emails about highly recommended study materials which can be (they probably should say, need to be) purchased. It’s not cheap this parenting lark.
An email from a teacher. The teacher asked Hawklad to stay in touch. That’s interesting as that very teacher hasn’t yet provided any teaching resources to Hawklad at any time this term……
4 remote lessons today. One completely missing. One mostly missing, maybe 5 minutes work provided. One sent a few questions, Hawklad completed them in 30 minutes (teacher sends questions but never marks any work Hawklad submits). One sent a few documents. One very detailed learning materials sent and followed up.
Would I miss homeschooling….. Yes I would
Would I miss school running homeschooling……. Most certainly NOT.
The long and slightly winding road. It doesn’t look much but it’s a bit of a pull up that slope. Unsurprisingly this little lane blocks quickly when the snow arrives. One day I will pick up the courage to try to sledge this all the way to the bottom. Our very own Cresta Run.
At the bottom of the slope (if I make it that far) I then need to find 2 feet of lift and aim for this gap in the hedge. If I pull that manoeuvre off then I will continue the sledge run across at least one more field. Miss the gap or get no height and it’s going to hurt. Hurt lots…..
As Hawklad points out. He will let Dad go first, clear a path and then if Dad is able to stand without medical assistance, then he will follow. It’s good to know that I still have my uses. 🤪🤪🤪🤪
As the colder, darker months fast approach some of the things that kept both of us going over the warmer months will become harder to keep going. New hobbies and new things to do are really needed. Especially as there is no immediate sign of a breakout from our ongoing family isolation. But we need to keep living. Preferably things that don’t involve pain…
I was looking on eBay for a second hand telescope to help with Astronomy as something we could do together. One to replace my very old small scope. I found a potential option. 4 hours to go on bidding and after 3 bids the price was at £30 plus delivery. That’s great for a £900 telescope. I made the offer. £35…. It was mine…. until 5 minutes before the auction closed. Two minutes later budding was at £300.. Pants. Didn’t bother seeing what it finally went for. Not this time.
But I feel better as I have done something. I’ve tried. Now what other random items can I find. What weird hobbies might open up.
Every year one of the great PREDATORS of our planet makes an appearance here. Forget your Great White Shark and your ‘don’t go into the water’ scream. Here it’s don’t go on the grass and whatever you do, Don’t Stand on one of these monsters.
Great White Sharks hunt alone, these beasts hunt in packs.
It’s not ‘You’re going to need a bigger boat’, its ‘You’re going to need a thicker shoe’.
It’s definitely an angry food….
So another morning of missing lessons and unsettling topics. Finally enough’s enough. That’s more than enough school angst for one week. For both of us. Hawklad was ordered to play on his new FIFA game (surprisingly he accepted that order without much protest). I went outside to change both blown car headlights. I know which task I would prefer to be doing…..
In the old days changing a bulb was an easy job. Open the bonnet, remove the old bulb, put in the new one. No tools required. Bask in the glory of being an official car mechanic. No need for that Mark 1 Escort Haynes Car Manual. People used to give them as Christmas Presents…..those were the days.
All those years later, all those years of technological progress and I find myself outside in the freezing Yorkshire rain. Briefed on the trials ahead via a helpful 10 minute YouTube video. A smorgasbord array of required tools crammed into my pockets. Years of progress mean that to change a car headlight bulb I now need to
– open bonnet
– unscrew and remove the front grill,
– remove the wheel arches
– remove the front bumper
– unclip the headlight unit
– remove the headlight unit
– unclip the broken bulb using a technique very similar to the sixth move of doom
– put on gloves as touching the new bulb will apparently cause a thermal nuclear explosion
– then reassemble the car…..
Unbelievably after two hours the process was completed. Ok the car might be out of diesel, it may well fall to bits the next time it’s reaches 30mph but at least the headlights are working.
Now to venture onto the lawn to pick up next doors dog’s poop. Yes I will be entering the land of the predator. Be afraid, be very afraid.
Red sky at night….
What kinda day will it herald in tomorrow.
Hopefully a better school at home day. Today has not been great but reflective of how things are going this term,
Lesson 1 – PE. Zero communication. Last year tasks were set for those at home. Garden challenges. Fitness videos to try out. Drills to improve sporting skills. It worked. Unfortunately nothing so far this term. So today’s PE lesson was taking the dog for a walk , then eating breakfast…..
Lesson 2 – History. Revision videos to watch, all focusing on the crimes of Jack the Ripper and forensic science. Hawklad’s anxiety levels rising.
Lesson 3 – Science. Exam questions on Disease, Heart Defects and Serious Illness. Hawklad unable to complete lesson due to anxiety levels spiking.
Lesson 4 – IT. Nothing. He ended up wading through the mountains of homework set in Religious Education.
Hopefully tomorrow is a better school day.
T
You know summer has gone when you return from an evening mad dog walk and you opt for a hot chocolate rather than a cold drink. Tonight was back to back drinks, that’s proper chilly.
“Dad we should go for a really long walk. Take Captain Chaos with us.”
That’s a big call for Hawklad. That might mean lots of gates to navigate without touching, increases the risk of meeting others. Needs to be carefully mapped out and planned. So maybe we could try to walk a bit further on the evening walk. It’s definitely quiet and I know exactly where the gates are.
Maybe he is thinking about building bridges. Getting use to being out in the big bad world again.
“No Dad we need to go much further but definitely when it’s quiet. It’s nothing to do with meeting people again.”
Ok then we might need to get up at dawn. Does he want to go anywhere in particular.
Apparently not. He just wants a long walk. Maybe it’s just a fitness thing. Maybe he thinks the four legged one needs more exercise.
Apparently not as well. So why does he want the long walk. Actually he wants his longest ever walk.
“It’s really about you Dad”
Oh I never saw that coming. Is he thinking I need to get out more. Maybe start hill walking again.
“No Dad. I was thinking this afternoon about my longest ever. Do you remember it. You took me when I had just started school for a short walk on the army land. You got lost and didn’t bother bringing a map because you didn’t need one. 5 hours later we got back to the car. Do you remember it rained and I didn’t have my coat as you said that I didn’t need one. We didn’t have any food or water. At one stage a soldier told us get back on the path”
Oh yes I remember that….
“I was thinking that my longest ever walk should have a purpose and not just be about my Dad being a muppet.”
He knows me to well……
A Dad trying to cope with the loss of his Partner and becoming a single parent. 