“Sometimes only one person is missing and the whole world seems depopulated” – Alphonse de Lamartine

Maybe it’s your partner. Maybe it’s your child. Maybe it’s a parent. Maybe it’s a friend. Maybe it’s a pet.

It does seem that way some days. Maybe it’s on a walk. MAYBE ITS STANDING BY A LONELY POND. Maybe it’s listening to a particular song. Maybe it’s during a movie. Maybe it’s when your in bed. Maybe it’s when your at the school gates surrounded by couples. Maybe it’s when your shopping. Maybe it’s just when you return to a home with no lights on.

But with bereavement it will happen. One gone make the world seems empty. So what do you do about it? Sadly no one right answer to that. Every person is different. Every grief journey is different. With me those lonely times still hit and still hurt. I try many things.

Sometimes I just let it hit me. Confused and helpless.

Sometimes I try to distract myself. Just hope I eventually forget that feeling.

Sometimes I just let it hit me but it’s kinda reassuring. Not ever loving would be so dreadful. Grief is another word for love.

Sometimes writing helps.

Sometimes reading blogs helps.

Sometimes I need to find solitude. Sometimes I need to be in a crowd.

Sometimes it’s reading an old favourite book.

Sometimes it’s looking at old photos.

Sometimes it’s playing a game.

Sometimes I go for a run.

Often it’s trying just that bit harder to be that better parent. Trying to make life just that bit more fun.

Then you get sometimes when the best thing is to carry on but just to do it louder. Much LOUDER. So this morning I am ironing but let’s just crank up that Iron Maiden cd just a little louder.

65 thoughts on “Sometimes

      1. For that you need a large hankerchief or tea towel and a steam iron. My Dad taught me to iron. Needless to say my beloved husband doesn’t iron anything though he’s excellent at creasing stuff.

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  1. Turn up even louder. I am pretty certain they need to do scientific study into how loud music gets certain things going emotionally. Oh, and you don’t need to tell yourself to be a better parent at times. You are a great parent.

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  2. Iron Maiden , yes! Great band if you want loud . Well it sounds like your doing what you need to help you with void of your partner. I do know this feeling . I have lost many and even when my son heads back to his college I feel that silence . The house is a bit quieter . Okay sorry not helping . Running is great though . But I do love your choice in music . Turn it up lol🙂hugs my friend .

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  3. I find autumn a difficult time of year. Every month is a reminder of loved ones no longer here with us. November is particularly difficult as it’s the month Dad died, my brother was killed by an impaired driver, and several other relatives left for that other plane of existence in the month of November. It is true each death brings another journey through grief, and is one is as unique as the individuals who died. I have employed many of the same techniques to deal with it, but nothing wipes it out, nothing makes me forget that pain. Perhaps being louder is the answer, or at least a reprieve. Iron Maiden eh? I don’t think I have ever listened to that particular band, but I am open to doing so. Hang in there my friend.

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  4. When faced with profound grief, I think you just need to do whatever gets you through the day. And honestly, I’m impressed with some of the coping mechanisms you’re using! I’m so very sorry for your loss…..

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      1. I’ve been trying, for every time we let him out, he embarrasses the heck out of us! All you guys have to do is stop inviting him! Your Queen is too kind, and now he and Boris and Nigel are likely to form a cozy little friendship. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

        Liked by 1 person

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