Proper Yorkshire weather. Two waterproofs, two jumpers, extra thick thermals required. No umbrella in the world will last 5 seconds in this.

Definitely had the country lanes to ourselves. In fact even too bad for animal or bird. The only exceptions, two intrepid swans on the lake but even those probably had wooly hats on.

As we hunkered even further down inside our waterproof Ironman suits we talked about life, school and Aspergers.

“Dad, now that I can read, can I get dyslexia taken off my medical record. I never got any help with it anyway..”

The conversation went on until….

“How do I get Aspergers taken off my medical record.”

Here’s why. To summarise this was Hawklad’s thoughts.

“I know I’m not cured. You can’t cure Aspergers. It is just who I am. It’s just that too many people don’t understand. They don’t bother to see, they just hear the word Aspergers and they just assume, assume wrong. Plus I don’t get any extra help for being listed as Aspergers from school and only a little bit from the Doctors. It isn’t doing me any good”.

What do you say to that. Especially when he’s right about too many people, the complete lack of adjustments from teachers and that the little bit of health support he does get is being phased out. Any support which had to be fought for is removed as the teenage years are reached. Adults are expected to fend for themselves. The Aspergers label helped explain some things initially, it probably helped the parents more but as Hawklad concluded

‘What is the point’…….

38 thoughts on “what’s the point

  1. Beautifully said. It is a helpless feeling, as well as heartbreaking, when a child feels different or inadequate for whatever reasons. It is obvious though he has a very devoted and supportive parent, and I’m sure the two of you together are more than enough to get through this! 🙏🙏🙏

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Too many people evaluate themselves and other people according to the labels placed on them by the medical field, the education system, and other peoples wrong assumptions. Hawklad seems to have a more realistic perspective of seeing himself. It’s much healthier. He’s a wise young man. Who needs labels anyway? It’s what and who he is inside that counts.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Where I worked 30 years ago we discussed the need for labels, and it was concluded they were needed so that other people could understand when those people with labels did things in public inconceivable to those people who had no knowledge of what the labels actually meant. We resolved to educate those “public” people.
    And after the discussion was over, no one did anything to educate the people. That was left for “others” to do.


  4. Having Aspergers helped my nephew get a job as large multinationals are obliged to employ a %. He doesn’t like the label either but it hasn’t prevented him from progressing or being promoted.


  5. Hawklad is very wise and insightful, Gary. I’m very sorry the education system just plain sucks with no proper supports or even accommodations provided. It’s wonderful you provide him with such a safe space and outlet to share his feelings openly and honestly.


  6. It’s not easy to have labels when people don’t understand what they mean and they don’t help you any. Hawklad is a brilliant and delightful lad. He has wisdom, wit and so much more going for him. Those labels should speak louder to everyone than his challenges. Those are the labels that should be recognized and encouraged. The Aspergers label should only gain him help and support and if he’s not receiving that help it makes so much sense that he’d want it dropped from his medical record. Love and prayers for you both. ❤ You’re a wonderful dad and son team. I’m sorry he doesn’t recieve the support he needs from school, but he has amazing support from a dad who listens, cares and works so hard for him. Good Job dad! ❤


  7. The wisdom of this young man is amazing me. Indeed, he is who he is, and Aspergers is part of who he is. But who says that this is not the “regular way” of how someone should be? Every child and person needs support in some way. He needs support in this way. But that doesn’t mean, he is wrong, only different … like everybody is!


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