Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 28 Comments

Trails

Paths in the sky. Never thought vapour trails could be a thing a beauty.

A pandemic forced a change of education path for us. Classroom schooling became school at home. The living room became the classroom. Not true homeschooling as school still provided the lessons. Sometimes the whole class was off, often it was just Hawklad. That’s gone on for 21 months now. 21 months and counting.

Over that period the idea was ultimately a return to the classroom. That’s what Hawklad wanted. Repeatedly Hawklad decided he wasn’t ready to return.

He’s still not ready to return.

Deep down I don’t think he’s going to feel able to return anytime soon. That’s not just my view. The medical opinion is a return to school is now unlikely before his final exams in 2023. Hawklad is starting thinking of a return to the classroom but that might not be until he potentially starts college in 2 years time. If he returns before his exams then that’s a bonus. It’s when Hawklad feels it’s the right time.

The question now is what do we do up to his exams. It’s looking like the school at home project is a path with many miles still to walk.

So

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 29 Comments

Don’t matter

Looks like someone has been trying to draw clouds with a pink crayon. Very nice 😊

If only everything else was very nice.

Two contrasting messages from Hawklad’s school today.

We hope all pupils enjoy the well earned Christmas break which starts on Friday.

This contrasts nicely with messages from 5 subject teachers (so far)

Remember to revise for your important subject exams over the holiday. Exams happen immediately after your time off….

I’m sorry but I can’t ever remember enjoying myself while I was revising. I guess it fits in with the Government message that children must work harder and play less. But over the last few years children are increasingly seen as second class citizens in this country. Last night the CLOWNS in charge of the country announced an emergency campaign to give all adults a THIRD booster covid shot within weeks. NO MENTION OF CHILDREN. Currently only something like 50% of secondary school age pupils have received just one vaccine shot. Younger children aren’t eligible for even one shot. Most schools here have still not received any air quality monitoring devices or any air filters that were promised months back. Promised so that schools would be safe. Masks are required in all public places, all except the school classroom…. The government person in charge of schools went on the television to talk about covid – he never mentioned schools or children ONCE. Not once….. The Governments only education strategy currently is to KEEP SCHOOLS OPEN AT ALL COSTS, surely it has to be KEEP OUR CHILDREN SAFE AT ALL COSTS.

Sadly children just don’t matter to those in charge.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 27 Comments

Unknown

A walk into the unknown……

As I’m typing this we should be in queue waiting to get into a rock concert in a busy northern city. As we are still 100 miles away, sat at home while Hawklad watches episodes of Parks & Recreation, I think we can call that a NO SHOW.

It was always more of a target for Hawklad to aim for, rather than a must see concert. A great band but The DARKNESS can wait for another year. Plus we have seen them twice already, in fact they were the last band we went to see before a certain pandemic hit. This concert was more about a potential marker to a return to a more normal, involved life. His return (and mine) into the real world. Six months to build bridges. In reality you can’t put a time on these processes, especially as yet another variant starts to surge through communities.

Hawklad isn’t ready yet. Those bridges are largely unbuilt. Certainly not ready to be packed in with a few thousand strangers.

The walk into the unknown continues…….

Much to ponder about life, the universe and homeschooling.

Time for a new target. Let’s call it a goal this time. A smaller step. Maybe not bridges built rather bridge building starting. Hawklad’s call is….

Go to the cinema to see a movie when it is really quiet. Almost empty cinema with no one sat near. More realistic as masks are enforced again.

Ok we can work towards that. May takes months (or longer) but it could happen eventually. Achieve that mini goal and then maybe THE DARKNESS might be more achievable.

The walk towards the known continues.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 37 Comments

Time

Poor Hawklad was trying to do a test paper at home today. Three long questions and 20 short ones in 90 minutes. That’s no fun at the best of times, especially when it’s a subject that he has zero interest in. But it’s so much harder when TIME is a mystery. He just can’t visualise time. He can’t get his head round it. It’s taking years but he can now tell the time from a digital clock but it doesn’t really mean anything. It’s just a number. He even says it as a number rather than an actual time. He can be doing things and he has no real handle of whether he has been at it for minutes, or for hours. That’s a huge problem in exams. Clocks that tell him nothing and so little grasp on how much time might have elapsed. It’s a common issue for many. It’s often cited as one of the most common problems individuals on the autism spectrum face in their daily life’s.

As a child I struggled with this. I would go out and not return home for hours, yet to me it felt like I had only been gone for moments. It was put down to my absentmindedness. But it wasn’t. Even when I tried I couldn’t get my head round time. The only exam I failed at school was in English. I took the subject a year earlier. 3 hours, 3 questions. As I finished the first question, in my head I was on track. 2 hours left…. That’s when the head teacher called out, ‘that’s time, please put your pens down’. Then a year later I had the reverse of the problem. I blasted through every paper and every question as if time was rapidly draining away. As I finished each exam I waited for the ‘times over’ call, but it didn’t come. I think I was finishing each paper within an hour with two hours to spare. I just couldn’t get my head round time.

As the years went on I have improved a bit. Mobile technology has helped. But I still struggle with the concept of time. Its often easier for me to see things in terms of events rather than timings. Thinking ‘just under Two hours’ doesn’t really help me but rather thinking ‘length of a football match’ does. I can feel that, I can visualise that. That is something Hawklad is now going to play with to see if it helps. Rather than thinking 45 minutes to do a question, trying to answer the question during say the first half of a football match.

Problem is that while he’s wrestling with understanding time, he’s not focusing fully on what he should be. Sometimes TIME doesn’t help at all.

I must admit

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 27 Comments

Wet Distractions

It’s a wet Wednesday here in the UK but at least yesterday’s storm has started to finally abate. Even the occasional break in the clouds. That always helps.

Definitely moody…..

Days like this can be a struggle for me. Distractions are always welcome. There are some amongst us who are always distracted.

Now that’s a hole. Giving someone ideas. Think of the socks which could be hid in that tunnel.

That’s some mouse……

Hawklad’s school feels like a mysterious hole somedays. Some things it is really good at doing. It never fails to let us know about kitchen closures, Christmas jumper days, school concerts. Yet the same school seems to find it so hard to get lessons consistently to pupils forced to be away from the classroom. The school gets glowing reviews and multiple awards for teaching quality yet it doesn’t seem to have the first clue on how to provide support to pupils with educational disabilities. I guess with less than two years of secondary education left for Hawklad, we may never get to figure that out. School and the education system isn’t changing any time soon.

Yes definitely a moody day.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 33 Comments

Free

That’s another weekend gone. Feels like I immediately need another one to recharge. Wishful thinking…..

It’s been the usual school effected weekend. Six pieces of homework talking Hawklad about six hours to complete. Why as a society do we have such a problem in letting childhood mean fun, freedom and adventures. I keep saying it….. if our countries so called Leader has to have his weekends off (because he needs them) then why can’t we let our children have the same leisure time. Is it because some people are deemed more important than others….

Hawklad didn’t complete all the work that was required of him but I stopped him. Enough is enough. Time to try and recharge. He won’t ever recharge doing Calculus questions but he just might when he can be outside and free.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 49 Comments

It’s Cold on page 264

Poor Hawklad was trying to do his school at home lessons. A teacher had uploaded work to be done online. That’s always a good thing and most welcome, unless you are Hawklad. The work kept referring to ‘review the key information on page 264 of your text book’. What text book….. Apparently the text book those in class use each lesson as a key part of the teaching programme. The class share copies so there isn’t one available to be sent home, so Hawklad did know that one even existed. At least we know now.

It’s cold. Not as cold as some countries but it’s cold for us. It’s definitely a two wooly jumper day.

It’s the kinda day for hot chocolate, soups and stews. It’s been a bit of a STEW fest recently. I can obliterate baking but I can do a might fine stew. What’s the secret to my STEWPENDOUS creations. Well I discovered that last night. Out of date herbs. Seriously out of date. We are taking Best Before A Very Long Time Ago. Best before ran out during Obama’s presidency (and not his second stint….). Oops….

The ageing adds to the flavour. As my parents would say when food hit the ground when I was a kid. Days when the food was quickly wiped on a sleeve and handed back for consumption.

“It will put hairs on your back son”.

Now a few millennial later and it certainly has done that….. If only my parents had put all this useful information and knowledge into a parenting textbook. I’m sure it would provide much reassurance on the use of out of date food items. It might even enlighten us to what key information can be found on page 264….

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 32 Comments

Let’s go walking

Let’s go walking

An early finish to the school day. A big advantage of the school at home project. Usually if a teacher forgets to issue work then we chase it up. Not this day. If the teacher forgets (and they did) let’s not remind them. Let’s see if they notice (and they didn’t).

An early finish means time for a long walk. I so wish Hawklad could use the time to meet up with friends. But as he is stuck with his gnarly Muppet Dad then the next best thing is a walk. Hawklad’s idea.

A walk from our house which we had never fully done before. 15km and we never saw another soul. Perfect for Hawklad.

Definitely beats school and school never missed him.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 40 Comments

Work

It takes a little bit of hard work to get to this spot but on a morning we can catch a mist covered view of the Vale of York.

Rewarding hard work.

According to those in charge of our countries school system, our children don’t work hard enough. Too much free time. So they are looking to extend the school day, reduce holidays and introduce more frequent, more extensive homework. Already lunch and school breaks have been cut back.

So clearly more hard work is required.

The following is an example of the current (not enough) homework being issued. Hawklad was expected to complete this over the weekend. One piece of work from Religious Education.

On top of this Hawklad had work to complete from English, Information Technology, Design Technology, History and Geography. He caught a bit of a break this time, no Biology, no Chemistry and no Maths homework.

And now the Government wants to add even more work on top of this….

The Prime Minister makes sure he gets weekends off to recharge and relax. Why can’t out children.

Posted on by bereavedandbeingasingleparent · 18 Comments

Tigers

Yorkshire does have its moments.

Here’s the thing, I almost missed that view. I have a habit of just looking straight ahead when I’m walking. As that view was behind me, it was lucky that I went out of character and I did glance back. Dad would be pleased.

I remember one relevant piece of wisdom which my Dad imparted on me when I was a LITTLUN. One day I was walking with him on the beach after he had stopped off to buy fish from the returning fishing boats. As we walked he pronounced that “I didn’t look behind me enough”. He was that kind of Dad, why just talk when a pronouncement could be made. When I asked why I needed to look back, his response will never leave me.

“You never know when you are being stalked by something like a Tiger…..”

Following my clearly bemused expression Dad quickly added

“Clearly it works as a tiger has never taken a chunk out of your Dads behind….”

I guess you can’t argue with the logic. A logic honed in the British Army as a Sergeant Major. Most of his service was in a land famed for Man Eating Big Cats. The tropical jungles of ICELAND….. But look at the evidence. No Tiger did ever attack my Dad on Redcar beach that morning. Further he avoided any unfortunate Tiger incidents for the rest of his life. Although I never did raise the fact that ‘my not looking back strategy’ had also avoided any Tigermageddons….. it wasn’t really worth raising things with Dad, he was born and bred in the heart of Yorkshire. Pointless arguing with anyone wearing a flat cap.

So yes, don’t forget to look back, you never know what you might be missing.